"working on this profile give me a sec."
trynna find soulmates..
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— 1 Comment— 1 Kudos
Category: Blogging
this isnt about him in particular, i had a friend i named after rupert. he has been the only person i have loved. so much that years later i lament losing his friendship. its been years & it still hurts so fucking bad. our memories do nothing but pick at the already raw scars. ive never felt anything as good as that friendship & i probably wont given how my life has progressed. i wish me writing t... » Continue Reading
— 3 Kudos
Category: Blogging
i trully struggle to put thoughts into words. but as of right now my thoughts are stuck. stuck from my past, in my head, & my brain is unable to conjure up new thoughts. just those old ones that used to hurt so much. who am i kidding, they hurt more now because i am still pathetically stcuk to them. my whole aches at the thought of that one person who managed to make me miss him for an eternity. h... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
we finally made it to ten. im surprised considering how long it took & surprised isnt even the word because im not really sure how that feels. kind of just have this void of a feeling. so deep & empty its almost as if there were no emotion at all, just whats left when theres nothing there to feel. to be honest its always how ive felt so trying at life is hard because theres nothing i feel & althou... » Continue Reading
— 2 Kudos
Category: Books and Stories
never thought ill make 9 of these in a row, to be honest i wouldve stopped the streak a couple of days ago. i have lost the initial passion to write. i dont really know what i even want to say anymore & i dont want to keep mentioning the fact that im so alone in life its practically painful. i dont want these blogs to be a reminder of how unnoticed i am. so lets change the subject, i started a boo... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
exhaustion has taken over today, i feel nothing. ironically i want to feel something. i want nothing more than to feel someone. to feel their affection, but thats old news, theres nothing ever new. just the same nothingness as always. the same feeling of when youre missing something but dont know what or where it could ever be. life becomes so mundane to the point where even things youve never don... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
wow a whole week of showing how empty i am & how empty my life is. we'll keep todays blog short, mostly because acknowledging how much life sucks is too much right now. i dont know what to do or what to even want to do. theres this modern day pressure of always having plans & thinking steps ahead but im tired of thinking like that. ive never gotten to just live in the moment. thoughts of the futur... » Continue Reading
— 1 Comment— 2 Kudos
Category: Blogging
i get a bit uncomfortable when im so open & expressive about my real thoughts. but im a no one & my words go no where so its fine, maybe itll end up helping me who knows. having inconsistent tendencies is something truly hard to get out of, but im on my sixth blog. so thats new & fun. coming up with revolutionary words is hard right now. todays rainfall has silenced me & all i want to do is not be... » Continue Reading
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural
i had a dream this morning that consisted of me & other people walking around looking for a place to dine in. in the dream i was holding hands with someone. what gives this dream importance is the person i was holding hands with. we went to high school together & he quickly became the best friend i never had but always wanted. we were super close, we would talk all day everyday, we would even stay... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
something kept me up all night last night. i was soundly sleeping until i wasnt. when i finally managed to sleep i kept having dreams of me & my family being attacked to the point of death. it wasnt my real family but it was the real me. dream me had to go through MULTIPLE different dreams with multiple different fake families. in the first one my fake little brother gets brutally strangled infron... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
woke up missing you today. to be honest not a day passes where youre not on my mind. i wish i knew if i was on your mind. woke up missing our conversations, even though they were always superficial & meaningless. i wish we still had conversations despite how lame they were. woke up thinking about your soft skin on mine. i wish we had gotten closer instead of farther apart. i wish you missed me as ... » Continue Reading
Category: Friends
lets talk plsssss hashtag bored » Continue Reading
Category: Life
i dont always feel alone, most days i feel nothing, like today. all i felt yesterday was an overwhelming cold feeling of hopelessness. today? nothing. like i was completely drained last night of all possible emotion. i could pray to God that i stay like this but why would i ever want to stay like this? i want to know what a good resonance of good feelings feel like. i want to be able to tap into a... » Continue Reading
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