653 as i write this dienstag only because i set my phone to german things went down since i last updated this thing. first of all, possibly the most important one: i broke up with my girlfriend, all after deep talks with some friends and meeting this guy at one of my university’s libraries—nothing happened with the guy, it was more like an excuse to realize i needed to let go. aside from that, i ... » Continue Reading
saturday as i write 2.15 it’s been… something. september got way worse than i would’ve imagined, but i kind of recovered from my eating disorder though i am falling onto it again because i was afraid i’d look ugly on my halloween costume (costumes? i have multiple parties to go to). and yeah. college has been alright, stressful like always but i’ve gotten good grades on my projects and exams to no... » Continue Reading
522 as i write this saturday my weeks have been hectic, and i’ve not even reached half of my semester. i think we’re on, what, the sixth week? about to start it, at least. my weeks can be summarized in a couple of words: public transportation, unbearable heat, german classes, and tons of psychoanalysis. if we’re talking academics, then i’m pretty confident—i participate, i do my readings, i study... » Continue Reading
528 as i write this friday i’ve been so busy it’s insane, no psychology student should have to be doing this much work—and i’ve not even chosen my specialty yet, i have a year left for that. life has been going cyclical: wake up, do nothing, go to college, suffer with no friends and eat my lunch, walk and take public transportation, go to my german classes, walk back to my sister’s college to pi... » Continue Reading
1123 as i write thursday or tuesday i do not know my life has been hectic. this new semester is apparently demented because i have professors that actually want students to learn, which i guess is good, but i’m also near dying because of my german classes so now i have to balance time and effort, and it sucks. worse than that, i got into a relationship, kind of. the girl i had a date with (previou... » Continue Reading
353 i hate this hour sunday horrible day my date went great, my birthday was amazing, everything was good. i had received news of who my new professors were going to be this semester and it appeared like i was going to put in the work which was “good”… and then i passed out. so, fasting and not eating for a long period of time will have effects on your body, who would’ve thought? worse than that, ... » Continue Reading
137 as i write wednesday i think it’s my birthday, yay. it fucking sucks, i was to go to a restaurant super far away from my home with some friends and i knew it was going to be a pain in the ass to ask my mother to take me there because (surprise!) i don’t know how to drive, and she always gets into these… “moods” when she has to drive me anywhere. i knew how she was going to act today and she st... » Continue Reading
352 as i write this monday my birthday is nearing, and it is terrifying. i’ve not been writing a lot because… i don’t know, i was tired. but i’m here again, which i guess is somewhat sad and equally depressing. my life has been going good, stable. i lost some more weight, i think, and my parents are getting worried about it. but it’s nothing some fake-o verbal abuse can’t fix. other than that, my... » Continue Reading
303 tuesday i think, i do not know. today is, as most may call it, oppenheimer day. i got no tickets for barbie, which bums me out, but it’s not like i was going to see it anyway because no one in my family wants to watch it and i’m supposed to wait for my best friend to come back from his trip—i have to wait for days. my marathon on wes anderson movies has been going good. i’m watching moonrise ... » Continue Reading
559 as i begin to write wednesday i bought those tofu noodles, and thank zeus i did because they were good. my whole day has been spent writing, and writing, and writing, and watching wes anderson movies. i’ve decided to watch all of his films, because i have nothing better to do and because i really enjoy his characters. today i finished the royal tenenbaums (i think that’s how you write it) and... » Continue Reading
530 as i begin to write this thursday i think it’s my father’s birthday today, which would’ve entailed me eating cake and going out to eat but he’s working so i’m free on that. i started fasting at 1 today, and i’ll see where it takes me—i’ve just been filling myself up with water but im relinquishing it now. the day started with me on my new mattress: glorious, beautiful, new. i actually did no... » Continue Reading
903 i think monday i think it got so much worse. i ate a tremendous amount of food, deleted my fast-tracking app and ended up baking some amalgamation of a cookie and a brownie that, according to my father, tasted good. then i got an idea for a new something, a typical college au that i have no idea of how to develop because i do not know how american universities work, so i’m currently breaking ... » Continue Reading