this is getting so bad

353 i hate this hour sunday horrible day

my date went great, my birthday was amazing, everything was good. i had received news of who my new professors were going to be this semester and it appeared like i was going to put in the work which was “good”… and then i passed out.

so, fasting and not eating for a long period of time will have effects on your body, who would’ve thought? worse than that, i was out shopping with my mother and sister which was grotesque to say the least—i am now banned from shopping. anyway, i went to go see a doctor and she took my glucose levels and they are dangerously high (189) which can mean two things: 1)this is just an after-effect from the fasting or 2)i’m pre-diabetic…

i’m going to get another blood test done on tuesday and then we’ll see if i am going to hell or if it was just because of my fucked diet.

anyway, i have to stop fasting and have to get into, like, forced recovery, which sucks because i’m not even that skinny—i’m, what? 46 or 45 kgs max? it’s ridiculous, i just look normal. the good thing is i’m probably just going to get into maintaining that weight, i’ll just up my caloric intake little by little and work out a little bit more now that i’m going back to college.

anyway, it appears that i get bad luck if i don’t write here so now i am bound.

lead me apollo, and thank you aphrodite.