for the past week or so i was doing really well. like...REALLY well. like ABNORMALLY well. but these past 2 days i started to feel the high wear off. like my insecurities and fears are coming back to haunt me. they found out i was happy and said oh fuck no we gotta get rid of that shit immediately. at first i was like man i have no idea why i'm so happy but then when the happiness started going a... » Continue Reading
well, to a certain degree. obviously freedom is a great thing. but not for me. i am currently unemployed and not in school, which means for me i technically can do whatever i want until i get a job. and theres the issue. doing whatever i want. there are too many options for the things i can choose to do because i have no limits and i have a hard time limiting myself because there's just SO MUCH TO... » Continue Reading
i've talked about my unhealthy realationship with daydreaming before, and unfortunately since then i still havent gotten better at managing them. in fact, i think im just getting worse. i think im getting worse in like every aspect in my life right now LOL. i've developed this really strange habit of curling up into a ball in bed and hiding my face and head with my hands and then closing my eyes ... » Continue Reading
Okay. Let's make this one short because it's 10 pm and i don't really feel like typing but i felty like making a blog about this cuz like why not? Anyways, so last night i FINALLY decided that I'm gonna take a real break from social media. Which is already proving itself to be harder than I initially thought. But I know the longer I'm away from it, the less I'll think about it, and the easier it'l... » Continue Reading
I'm a hypochondriac so every health related thing I say should be taken with a grain if salt (maybe I shouldnt say that lol), but lately the fatigue I've been feeling has been kinda extreme? like I really dont have the energy to do anything. perhaps it could be my poor diet, lack of exercise and horrible sleep schedule (which are all plausible reasons for your body to feel like shit) or (what I've... » Continue Reading
a friday night funkin post on my not friday night funkin' blog? i might copy and paste it on there later idk yet. (by the way, any funkheads who follows me here and wants to read a bunch of my stupid funkin' opinions check tha funkin' blog wink wink) . lets just get into it. now i wanted to talk about friday night funkin and stuff bc of some tweets i seen recently. i have delete my m » Continue Reading
a while back maybe like pshh a few months ago I realized how much I would interact with useless content like drama videos and yk things involving drama between content creators and all that stupid shit that I simply just dont care about. after I became hyper aware of the fact that I dont care about half the shit that goes on on the internet anymore I've been trying to really distance myself from t... » Continue Reading
I'm like 95% sure I've been experiencing maladaptive daydreams. this is something I think I've been experiencing for years but I've never even considered it daydreaming bc well I just a kid and it's normal for kids to just imagine things in their heads n shit. at some point it was just like I'd only do it at night to like sleep and shit. I feel like it was more controllable back then which is a bi... » Continue Reading
today I was gonna write about something really serious and heavy but I realized that I've done that twice and talking about sad shit is not gonna make me feel better. so let's talk about something that makes me a n g r y. well okay, angry is an overstatement. it doesnt make me angry. it just makes me a liiittle upset. so the new spiderverse movie came out and yk artists are riding the fuck out the... » Continue Reading
i've been havin a problem lately. well more like for a very long time but its only gotten worse since i haven't properly dealt with it. the title makes it pretty obvious about what it is. i'm gonna skip around a lot because i am currently extremely out of it and i don't even feel alive write now while i'm writing this so it prolly isn't gonna make much sense. my experience with social media has al... » Continue Reading
so i just got back from a road trip. a CHURCH related roadtrip. oh boy. now, i want to make a separate blog for my feelings on road trips in general because i hate them but for now we're just gonna talk about the church portion of the trip since that was like yk the main course and what not. i aint gonna get into the details but it was like a little "festival" type deal but before that we had to h... » Continue Reading