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Category: Life
been a while. Ive recently bought new clothes, leg warmers and a black mary janes shoe!! ヽ(・∀・)ﾉ I have to wait for the last two though cuz theyre bought online. My brother got upset cuz he didnt get to buy what he wanted, i felt bad... my dad wants to make it up to him. Anyways, the meds are still bad. not » Continue Reading
Category: Life
These meds are terrible n they're only sleeping meds. I've not meet up with my psychiatrist yet. I'm dissociating rlly badly bc I can't just... sleep immediately even with the meds. Especially with the meds. I feel like a braindead statue. My vision is blurry but I think that's just my overdue prescription glasses. Everytime I try to sleep, I always feel something active. Smth like a locked-in sy... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Wow this week's been rlly busy. On Friday, were told to make a poster based on a theme weve chosen. On Saturday, my family decided to go on a vacation, which was rlly exhausting cuz i had plenty of hw due next week. Many of them were almost finished tho, so im good. Today, were going back home!! Yay cuz i literally cant stand this island lmao. and tbh, i wasnt expecting to go in the weekends. Th... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Wrote this in the middle of the night xddd Today was the class party I talked abt in my previous blog. We had some classes in the morning til 11:45. I made a mother's day letter for one of the classes but I unfortunately can't bring it home just yet bc it's actually actually part of the assignment, I cried writing a letter for my mom lol. The class party started, I planned to bring chocolates bu... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
tw mentions of self-harm Yesterday was extreme. I've been off from school for a week n i cried trying to explain to my parents abt why i was scared to go to school. they weren't so sweet abt it ofc. I was sent to school anyway n on our way there, my dad just... scolds me. idk the right words but it was between verbal abuse and a simple scolding. Either way it affected me til i got to school. It wa... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Had another counselling session. I dont think im comfortable with the counsellor tbh. He kinda laughs at me when i talk abt smth which makes me embarassed n he doesnt seem to take me seriously (which i see pretty much every adult is doing). Ofc there are some funny things ive said but he mostly laughs at the ones that r serious. Maybe im just too sensitive. Plus, if i were to talk abt my parents a... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Yesterday was my birthday!! Worst birthday ever ngl. We ate out n thats it. After that, i was forced to go somewhere i didnt wanna go. There were sm people and i got anxious. When i asked them if i could shop for clothes instead, they told me we didnt have money ⁽⁽(੭ꐦ •̀Д•́ )੭*⁾⁾ Weve only spent our money on food. I was already depressed n having to go somewhere i hated made it even worse. The e... » Continue Reading
Category: School, College, University
Tw mentions/implications of self harm Today was tiring. I realise how im quite active in drawing at school compared to at home. I barely draw at home. The minster of education announced that therell be no outdoor activities (yay) but we still had to do our cocurricilar (cocum/kokum here) activities indoors °՞(ᗒᗣᗕ)՞° I decided to join cheerleading cuz everyone had to participate in an activity fo... » Continue Reading
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural
had a weird dream abt my grandparents (mother's side; mother's parents basically) n i think this is a sign. Ive not met them in a while (grandfather died in 2017) and we've had plans to meet them again, but my dad doesn't let us for personal reasons. The dream was all jumbled up but i can make a coherent story abt it. no idea how it started so im only writing the ones i remember clearly, I wrote a... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
had my 6th counselling session today. My mom lied about it being my last lol. Todays session was bad. I cried. Unfortunately cant say much about it. He told me he saw a bit of improvement in me so thats why i still needed some counselling. I dont feel like my situation fits counselling at all n i kinda dont feel comfortable with a male counselor. Ive been meaning to talk abt this to my mom but idk... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
tw mentions of self-harm idk what im feeling at this point. Is it boredom, relief or sadness? im not even sure about my future. im rlly demotivated. tired. the most productive things ive done lately was relapsing (sh) n drawing. which was only a little. bc of how demotivated i am, im only able to think abt scenarios. sometimes scary, sometimes creative. rlly good inspirations for my art but i cant... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
had my 4th counseling session two days ago. The session was weird. I got a little angry n he kept asking me questions which irritated me more. I was just rlly tired of explaining. My mom says once all my counselling sessions are over, Im gonna move to therapy. I wish i have someone i can obsess over, ive not been feeling "in love" to a close person in a while. ik i have celebrities but i mean lik... » Continue Reading
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