"going insane"
23 y/o | they/them | ace | german
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SpaceHey Blog URL:
https://blog.spacehey.com/ki11joy
Category: Life
(idk if i should put these in the blogging or life category. what's the difference?) my head hurts, i'm hungry and everyone is getting on my nerves. don't talk to me!! i just left the discord voice chat without saying » Continue Reading
Category: Life
my brother and i have a weird relationship. we are both close and distant at the same time. after my mental illness started affecting me in my youth, i was too distracted to spend as much time with him as we did as kids and we both lived our lives kinda separately. i moved out 4 years ago, 3 driving hours away from my parent's house. i missed most of his teenage years. when we saw each other, he s... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
i was a bit dramatic lol no, maybe not. when i wrote that blog entry, i really was hurting really badly. and everything i wrote is still kinda true. the thing that got me to write that was that my partner wasn't there for me. i went to work yesterday after we didn't really talk to each other in the morning. i talked about what happened with my new fav coworker (we're both mentally unstable) and de... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
tw // mention of suicide my bad, i forgot. i forgot that it's you who's suffering. my bad. i forgot that it's about you when i break down crying. yeah, you're right. you SHOULD interrupt me and make the conversation about your problems while i'm trying to tell you how much i think about k*lling myself lately. sorry, i should've thought about your feelings when i asked for support. my bad, i should... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
hi! i'm back from the dead (if anyone even remembers me lmao). somehow i got caught up in real life again and was too stressed to write anything. when i think about it now, it makes no sense. i always want to write about my life when nothing's happening, but when a lot of stuff is going on, i can't. well, anyways... back to the topic of this blog entry! i hate it when i can't control things. when... » Continue Reading
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Category: Life
no responsibilities. no work. nothing to do except for napping 10 times a day and playing with my humans. some people might say we're lucky to be born as humans, because we're the most advanced species on earth bla bla technology bla. whoever thinks this: NO! YOU'RE WRONG!! i hate having to work, i hate having to talk to people, i hate needing to manage my free time, i hate doing chores, i hate ne... » Continue Reading
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Category: Life
i went shopping today with my boyfriend and a friend. my mental state is getting worse again. today proved that. i always had issues with not being listened to. back in the day, i was often ignored, especially in groups. which made me feel unwanted. the effect of that experiences is that i easily get triggered, even if the other person not listening was accidental and i know that. we were in a fe... » Continue Reading
— 4 Kudos
Category: Life
i have a new coworker at work. we get along very well. i liked him from the beginning, so much that in my head, he's now my "work bestie". he's a few years older than me (28), but doesn't act like it at all. at first i thought he's around his early 20's or even still 19 years old. he's a bit confused all the time, but very nice and cares about doing his work (which i can't say about some other cow... » Continue Reading
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Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
i had to talk to him today and... usually, i try to make interactions with customers as short as possible, so i don't say much. especially with customers i can't stand. but sometimes i'm just too nice. today my least favorite regular came in. he's a man in his 40s(?) who talks way too much and often makes unfunny sexist jokes. "women, right?" ugh. i always try not to engage in conversations with h... » Continue Reading
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