Cat_ann

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"hope left me"

she/her

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Mood: Too many thoughts


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— 1 Kudos

I Thought - I Would - Be More - Than This

Category: Life

Steve Albini passed today, of a heart attack, as I am writing this. 24 hours ago I saw him reply to someone on BlueSky about something I didn't really get, terms beyond my limited understanding, simple things really. It couldn't have been that long afterwards that he passed. It all comes at you so suddenly. I suppose it's never really hit me before, how sudden it all is, is why I'm writing this ri... » Continue Reading

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NEW MUSIC

Category: Music

https://cat-machine.bandcamp.com/album/ghost https://cat-machine.bandcamp.com/album/ghost https://cat-machine.bandcamp.com/album/ghost https://cat-machine.bandcamp.com/album/ghost NEW MUSIC 31 TRACKS AMBIENT / VAPORWAVE / BROKEN TRANSMISSION / PLUNDERPHONICS / L » Continue Reading

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"I'll figure it out though"

Category: Life

everyone i know is nervous, sad, and poor they're too busy for life they have a job they're too stressed to live they lack a job they don't believe in the future except for a job they just want to exist they need a job some are too tired. some are too weak. some can't find the time. some have far too much time. and they keep saying, "I'll figure it out" but everyone i know is still nervous. but ev... » Continue Reading

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i thought i heard you say i like you

Category: Life

feelings are such a drag. emotions never really make sense to me anymore, not that they ever did to begin with, but now specifically feels like feelings never really got to know me. i dont know whats wrong with me. i feel stuck, unable to express anything i want to, fully incapable of holding meaningful conversations with those i want to with. when did this happen? a few months ago, circa septembe... » Continue Reading

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LAETIFICUS (Chapter 3)

Category: Writing and Poetry

!! !!CONTENT WARNING!! !! The following chapter contains depictions of medical imagery, vomiting, blood, and self harm. » Continue Reading

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4 Comments— 7 Kudos

A Conversation

Category: Writing and Poetry

(between two people who don't exist.) content warning: suicidal allusions. Say we’re the last two people on Earth, ...What are you talking about? Just hypothetically speaking. Maybe we’re the last two survivors of some crazy apocalyptic event, Or one day we wake up and everybody else is just gone, Or we come into being one day on an empty planet without our memories, What would » Continue Reading

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LAETIFICUS (Chapter 2)

Category: Writing and Poetry

!! !!CONTENT WARNING!! !! The following chapter contains depictions of self harm, vomiting and suicidal ideation. » Continue Reading

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1 Comment— 2 Kudos

LAETIFICUS (Chapter 1)

Category: Books and Stories

"Where are you going?" The figure turned around slowly, looking back at Marisa with an expressionless face. Their eyes were dark and empty, their lips curled upward into a forced smile. "I'm... leaving, I guess." Her sister replied after a moment. She looked down at the gro » Continue Reading

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2 Comments— 4 Kudos

LAETIFICUS (Chapter 0)

Category: Books and Stories

!! !!CONTENT WARNING!! !! The following story contains themes of child abuse and neglect, mentions of alcoholism, and depictions of suicide/self harm. Please be aware of these things and please do not read this story if you are prone to suicidal ideation. Laetificus » Continue Reading

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— 1 Kudos

breaking the habit

Category: Life

when i was a kid listening to Breaking The Habit in my moms car she was like adamant telling me that Chester was an addict because of the song's lyrics she was right but i dont think it was public knowledge at the time, i think the fact she is also an addict just tipped her off » Continue Reading

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— 2 Kudos

poem(?) 2

Category: Writing and Poetry

CW: self harm references - Darkest -  A crimson mark across my arm  Rusted into dull brown discolor  It warms a void in my gut,  Tickles as it mutilates my tissue,  That straight-edge seeping slowly in,  A greusome glint within a fissure of deepest flesh,  Bleeding for my anxiety  Bleeding for my agony  Bleeding for my aching  Bleedin » Continue Reading

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— 1 Kudos

poem(?)

Category: Writing and Poetry

 I wonder what's down that road?  They told me that it was deadly  They said there is a graveyard for the mind  That no one ever comes back from  "I buried my mother" you once said to me  I remembered everything, and asked if I could see » Continue Reading

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