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wplace!
Category: Blogging
its awesome dude! how did i miss it whne it started?!?! » Continue Reading
ƹꭓȿʈ.flac Ç♱
"trying to maintain my life"
im a earth dweller
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ƹꭓȿʈ.flac Ç♱'s Blog Entries
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revisit
Category: Music
so im revisiting The Devil-Faces of My Old Friends, Beneath Me , with the really good song called The mint that grows behind the dumpster that basically got me into the world of emo and hardcore music. i didnt listen to the other songs of the album at all to be honest, and now, listening to them now, wow, holy crap its amazing. » Continue Reading
not listening to music for a week challenge
Category: Music
look, i love music , but, i kinda have a music addiction, and for quite some time ive consistently been using music in a unhealthy way. like trying to escape my problems with music or procrastinating by listening to music or listening to music anytime my brain isnt occupied by anything like a boring walk to school or skipping through endless albums or songs to get a quick easy dopamine hit. and » Continue Reading
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when you try read, anyone just?
Category: Blogging
When im reading a book i cant seem to actually absorb its content. Especially non fiction. Like im interested in the book, i want to learn and absorb about what its offering, but i cant seem to. i barely get any of it in my head. I try to reread and reread and analyse but i just cannot. maybe i need to like i guess adjust my environment or something. man its annoying » Continue Reading
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immersed in digital stimulation, detached from reality
Category: Life
its the school holidays, so 2+ weeks of complete free time, and for this past week all i have been doing is staying in my room and sitting behind my laptop. reading manga, consuming media, playing video games, really allowing myself to be immersed in a digital world. basically devoid of engaging much in real life things though. not eating much, not drinking water much, not excercising, not medita... » Continue Reading
living life on autopilot
Category: Life
a lot of my waking hours feel as though im on auto-pilot mode. my days always feel like im literally just watching myself live my life like a show or something. its like my conscious and self awareness, or the real me i guess, is hidden inside, trapped, caged and inable to really get out as my physical body does everything and i turn into this half aware zombie » Continue Reading
just finished reading Monster
Category: Books and Stories
geez that was a manga. read 100+ chapters in a week or two. so many clues and twists and turns, ties and connections. nihilism. identity. morality. a very addictive read. good manga. good good good one. now, its time to watch the anime. » Continue Reading
days flying past me as i stand still doing nothing
Category: Life
i feel like my days are rolling by, and people my age are moving forward, improving,growing,maturing and experiencing. while im just standing still, shifting behind a bit actually. simply there, doing nothing. nothing memorable or productive or fulfilling. and all of it is probably all my fault. so why do i dwell in my pool of inaction? is it maybe because im just so too scared to get out of my co... » Continue Reading
need a haircut but too scared toooo
Category: Blogging
i sort of need a hair trim. though the problem is. i have social anxiety. And that, well, you know makes something as simple as going to a hair saloon, quiteeeee difficult. I usually want to like mentally prepare, plan what to say, think of what could go wrong, plan which saloon place to go to, think of how to avoid talking to the barber, think about how to explain how i want them to trim my hair.... » Continue Reading
so many school clubs!
Category: School, College, University
so theres like maybe a handfull of clubs at my school. recently my schools been encouraging clubs being created. photography club soft launched just this week ( i went) and theres a warhammer club that could be created (very recently). the thing is, on wednesdays, theres several clubs running at lunch break, and theres 3 i want to go to but im not sure which to choose. i dont want to rotate each ... » Continue Reading
turned 14 today, not sure how to react to it.
Category: Life
i dont really feel like im 14. and i dont know how to feel about it. its strange. how did a year go by that fast? it was febraury last year not so long ago right? 12 months. is it even that long? alright, not many knew it was my birthday, but my mum and a friend remembered, so im happy with that, better than noone. today wasnt that interesting honestly, just felt like another day. what im mostly c... » Continue Reading
i kinda want to try focus/concentration pills
Category: Life
im bad at focusing on stuff i dont want to do and get pretty distracted easily. so what ive been thinking about for the past few months is, what if i try focusing pills? im definetely sure that pills of these kind exist. but really, dont i need to like 18 to buy them from a pharmacy? or one of my parents. i dont want my parents involved though. ugh. mannn... maybe this focus issue is because of m... » Continue Reading