"slowly decaying "
:b
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SpaceHey Blog URL:
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Category: SpaceHey
So I'm gonna use this platform to vent all of my notes I write on my phone because I want to be heard and I want my story to be heard if I ever disappear. also please share your thought, give me advice or same somthing silly in the comments the fact ppl read thease gives me so much joy i love the internet and u guys » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I hate that he fucking does this like he knows I always wanna gucking see him and hang out but I gucking give up now like every week he says he's so busy HE PURPOSELY MAKES HIMSELF BUST ALL THE TIME WITH USELESS SPORTS AND MUSIC AND TRACK AND FEILD AND CROSS CONTRY LIKE FUCK THERES OTHER THINGS YO LIFE THEN MAKING YOURSELF SO RIDICULOUSLY BUSY FOR NO RESON! » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I've been feeling better at school since alot of my courses are easy and I've settled in now also the weather is getting alot warmer and the sun is out and I'm feeling alot happier minus the bullshit I deal with at home whenever I'm with Noah I'm so happy and I feel like I'm the luckiest boy alive. This summer I wanna do alot with Noah I do t want to fall into summer depression agian I wanna go to... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
things are getting harder to deal with, i dont know how much longer it will take before i shut down agian. im already cutting people i valued out of my life, i really hope i dont do that to caden or ava and most importantly noah, hes the only reson im alive right now and getting through high school. i feel like ive been lost for so long now i genuinly dont care what happens to me or others. i fee... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Yesterday when I was siting with Noah and that random girl comes up to us and goes "NOAAH!" all fucking excited and shit like asoon as I see her I wanted to stab her with anything I could find like dont ever e so excited to see my boyfriend like that ever. She should see the things I can make him do and the things I make him feel. It pisses me off so much I physically can't speak or ill scream and... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Cameron talked to me today while I was waiting for Noah. I like how he talks about how other people get pissed at him for the smallest reasons, it makes me feel like im more smarter then them or he actually values me a bit more therfore he's comfortable talking abt how pissy ppl can get.1+ info there is a very good chance Lukas is actually Jewish so my assumption was right, doesn't explain why he'... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I think I had another dream about jack last night. I don't want to dream abt him he's cringe. I've been feeling very tired during the day and more awake at night unless I'm with Noah them I'm kinda sleepy. In the mornings when my alarms goes off I feel the dread of living and responsibilities. I choose to live yk like wtf. Every passing day I see my self more and more likely to end it, I just don'... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Obviously my decision to disassociate from logan is a selfish thing and I already feel horrible but i don't feel like you'd really understand think in my shoes me and Emily have had to deal with logans problems this whole time he never fixes any of them himself he just let's them get worse therfore the best freinds I've lost, the random people who hate me, I seems like I'm always the one having to... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Lately this week I've been thinking alot about jack I've dreamed of him a couple times and last night I dreamed he had a big sign that said somthing and I remember crying and then him saying " I was so stupid back then, I love you" sonthing along the lines of that and he asked if I loved him and I said "a part of me with always love you but you said it yourself there will be peolle out there who w... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Why can't I just be normal, a functional citizen, why do I always have to make my life into a massive mess and then complain about how I don't know what I'm doing anymore or who I am. I physically can't talk to people I force myself to not cry and scream when in the same room as strangers I feel my heart scream at me to worry and be scared. I don't have a more worst fear then the judgment of other... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I'm not good enough for anyone why did he lie to me I noticed he lies alot to me but everyone does even my closest friends lie I don't know why but I assume they just don't trust me no one really does but I don't trust people either so it's mutual. I can feel myself slipping into it agian the empty emotionless depression and no appetite state I hate that state because my mom worries for me but I k... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I go to England tomorrow I've been waiting for this trip for years I've been stuck in boring violent Canada for years and I want to experience living somewhere else and see what other people in the world do even though I couldn't care less but i might live in the United Kingdom one day you never know where you'll end up when your older anything could happen I might be forced out of Canada from stu... » Continue Reading
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