"Fuckin around"
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Category: Life
OKAY SO My birthday is in like an hour and I will be turning eighteen. I’ll be a legal adult!!! This should be exciting!!! But I am not at all excited dude. I’m not even scared, im just kinda??? Frustrated??? I feel like I never had the space to be a teenager and now my time is up. I should have gott » Continue Reading
Category: School, College, University
Today’s my first day of senior year in High School and for once I am super excited to be back here. I remember my first days of High School I came home sobbing because everything felt so cold and unfamiliar and now this place is like a second home to me, funnily enough. There is barely any record of myself back then- I avoided cameras like the plague. I don’t feel much better about myself but I k... » Continue Reading
Category: Friends
I was out with my friends today and frankly I was exhausted and so mentally over it but I pushed through anyways and it was kind of a wake up call to realize how much a smile matters to people. You don’t even have to be sincere but as long as you put in some effort it brings other people in and makes them comfortable, and even happy. This is like obviously something you learn three hours into bei... » Continue Reading
Category: Religion and Philosophy
Soooo fun fact about me, I grew up a Jehovah’s Witness. Recently (about a year ago? Maybe two?) my family decided to leave the church for some weird iffy feelings about the organization, but it was very firmly established that the /teachings/ were not the issue. My extended family is still really into it though, and I myself am kind of considering going back? I miss the community and i still keep... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I hope if i am (for whatever weird ass reason) thinking about having kids I remember all the hell that I put my mother through in my first month of life alone. Shes even said her life has been tormented since the day she fell pregnant so please god do not let me follow. » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Aka i went to my grand aunt’s funeral and am making it about me // talk of death and funerals yadda yadda yadda I really don’t think its right to attend funerals when you didn’t know the deceased/family that well. Like. This is that person’s family’s last chance to say goodbye to them forever its so incredibly invasive to just stand there. Ill never be able to describe what it felt like to watch... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Cw/// SH LMAO my mom found out about my sh and if this ruins my plans for today im gonna be so pissed » Continue Reading
Category: Writing and Poetry
//themes of death And there it is- Another girl dead and buried and gone. Spill some liquor on the name of moving on. …Go on, down your throat, let it slide. Let that familiar burn replace the divine. It’ll take the place of a god she’ll never see, not after she’s been damned for sins shaped like me. Pull the same shit that took her in the first place, that same lost and delirious look on your fa... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Cw// talk of seizures and of suicide So uh. I was in health class today taking fitness tests. The kid i was partnered with had a seizure. It was really out of the blue and scary but the coach stepped in, the kid was assisted professionally and is on the way to a quick recovery don't worry. But i didn’t want to talk about the seizure itself more so the reactions. Everyone was either frozen and sta... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
This is kinda a vent but like Today marks the anniversary of me deciding to just kind of shut myself down to my parents and I've never felt this much peace and angst at the same time???? Idk i guess it might just be me being a terrible daughter but whatever » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
My fatal flaw is fucking around so im messing w this layout until its unrecognizable » Continue Reading
Category: SpaceHey
My acc is gonna suck actual ass bc im on mobile but YKW COPE » Continue Reading
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