again i felt a little left behind like this life wasn't meant for me, and in a lot of ways i just don't feel like i was meant to be born as a human in this place, the idea of being alive and living a life expected of me is suffocating I feel like, to combat this, i must become unexpected and selfish selfish enough to take parts of my life and reserve them only for me myself and for nothing more th... » Continue Reading
My day went as usual, mostly filled with entertainment nothings. Mostly doing things I usually do to fill time that requires minimum effort. I was FUCKING STARVINg this morning,, and I worked with whatever we had. There was one singular egg left in the fridge so i blended it with whatever non-wilted celery we had left ((i usually use spinach or something similar but it went bad)) I was really t... » Continue Reading
I find it difficult to see my own worth and importance as is. It's dfinitely a me problem, one I don't enjoy and am always trying to shift my view on. A lot of the time, when a blank space is left, I will assume the worst of it. Unironically the popularised tumblr phrase, "but a third secret option,," has helped me a lot with this. I cannot predict every outcome, and that's natural and normal. ... » Continue Reading
Hi. This blog series? blog mini-series? blog long writing campaign? anyways just know that this is probably gonna be the first of a very long sequence of blogs. or just regularly long depending on how much of it i'll actually write down. and of course, how long this all lasts. I had a nightmare the other day. But to fully show you how strange and terrible it was, I need to introduce you to the con... » Continue Reading
Mumma, don't hold me with fear Don't weigh your stones when I've barely been born Don't protect me from the world I want to see Mumma, I'm scared but let me be scared Please don't praise your sons just to look at me with pity Hold me highly, too I wanted to be great, too I can never just be great So this once, lend me your pride Just this once, let me stand beside ev » Continue Reading
Your eyes have nothing to see Your heavied breaths heaved no air Whatever dust and mites filled your lungs blackened when you were born you were covered in a dark red Be grateful that I swaddled you then and took you in Be grateful that I allowed you to live You lived beautifully, you sang, you dance, you celebrated what I greived You're so preferable your soul was born preferable ye » Continue Reading
had a drram wher3 i ate honey lamb burger for 5.30 well technically i didn't est it but i was tgere and ordered it but it never came also therr was a bowl of potato wedges on the table and all the other plates were empty » Continue Reading
Literally and figuratively To everyone sick and struggling, I get how suffocating it can feel to constantly maintain yourself. Like a delicate piece of machinery, constantly worked and taken apart and and screwn back into place, constantly cleaned and changed and torn and replaced and fixed just to keep yourself afloat, while most people get to run freely with little to no maintenance. It can mak... » Continue Reading
Majority of these r horror movies,, have a lot of gore and nudity in them, so pls watch at ur own discretion if you are planning to there's this website called doesthedogdie.com which can help you discern on whether or not you'll be able to//want to watch it anyways yeah The Thing ((1982)) I like this movie, it was very fun to watch. I have a bit of face blindness so it » Continue Reading
okay so there r only twoo & thiss wasss a pretty long time ago ((like 1-2 weeks ago)) but yeah movy. they call it movie because picture move. Anyways let's get on to it!!!!!!!!!!!! Herb ((2007)) The movie itself was so and so,, but it revealed to me dynamics that I don't often see in media- (and would like more of, honestly.) Aside from that,, I found that I held the characters » Continue Reading
I take time out of my hairdrying to announce things that I think will better the lives of many (me. The life of me..) No. 1 Hairdryer without the noise. simple. it's in the title. hairdryer that doesn't make the scary noise. okay next No. 2 Vaccum/hoover/wh » Continue Reading
i feel that i am a person who gets deceived easily i trust with my whole heart,, and get surprised when it breaks I've learnt now,, that what people may say isn't always true I know now that I am not naive or stupid for trusting people so easily and that it wasn't wrong of me to be so naive and stupid I was a kid. I'm still a kid,, really. I don't necessarily want to build a wall around myself,, b... » Continue Reading