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the world disgusts me
Category: Life
and its not really a feeling I can control, I want to love the beauties of life and all but the world and people make me feel sick and an indescribable sense of dread.. » Continue Reading
ashton
"socialized too much I wanna sleep"
14, I like drawing and noodles..
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ashton's Blog Entries
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i want the ability to make everyone quiet when I want them to
Category: Life
the world is so loud, the house is so loud, the school is so loud, everyone is so loud, everyone speaks and moves so loudly, I wish I could get moments peace whenever I desired it. » Continue Reading
day entry 2 and also a long lost realization
Category: Life
today I woke up earlier then usual.. (7 am) so I thought hey- lotsa people start off the day this early, maybe it could benefit me!! it did not.. but anyway not main subject ill get on.. I watched episode 2 of lain, made some cat sculptures out of clay, browsed some stuff on the computer, unlocked another ending of needy streamer overload and milk outside a bag of milk, ate my finger off trying to... » Continue Reading
day entry 1
Category: Life
i was supposed to go to school today, but my dad said that since my exams ended (and yes they did, I got good scores other then history, with 65.. ive gotten 32 before, its fine. might aswell say since im on the topic, I got a 93 from math :D im very happy about it, my efforts weren't in vain ^u^) I could stay at home today. so I slept.. until 2 pm.. lol T.T.. then I ate noodles yet again at 3 pm ... » Continue Reading
nowhere to go really
Category: Life
I never felt like I belonged anywhere.. my household isnt a terrible place to be in by any means, but I feel like someone else would be happier here.. someone would make my parents happier, make good of what they own, be more outgoing. I am the opposite of that.. I love my parents.. but I feel like a spectator of my own life, just witnessing how the parents care, not being the one cared for.. ive ... » Continue Reading
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singing a song that no one will ever hear
Category: Life
i sang duvet alone in my room, and I got kind of a bittersweet feeling. no one will ever hear me sing this song.. or remember this memory.. it is only my memory. does that make my memory special, or meaningless?.. I dont know. im kind of lost thinking about it. my memory is special because no one else will know of it. my memory is meaningless because no one else will know of it. or neither. I dont... » Continue Reading
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angels are invisible to keep us sane
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural
a lot of the times when im alone in my room I feel watched, even though I fully know that I am alone here.. atleast with a biological body.. do you ever think that feeling you get of being watched could be an angel watching you?.. is it paranoia or am I really not alone?. ive never been the most religious person.. I sleep through religion class because it for some reason kind of makes me anxious. ... » Continue Reading
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I love seals!!!!
Category: Pets and Animals
SEALS ARE SO CUTEE.. ESPECIALLY THE BABY ONES >u » Continue Reading
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our existence is selfish
Category: Religion and Philosophy
(a little pessimistic, bewarned..) theres a big, big universe that our minds cannot physically comprehend.. theres so much going on, theres light years things away.. our sun is small, our earth is microscopic, we are but a minuscule.. when you compare all of that to our silly little lives, it all just seems selfish.. we aren't helping anyone but ourselves. maybe we were created by accident. invent... » Continue Reading