"necrophiling"
#ハケ岳南麓より#ハケ岳南麓#ペンペン草 #ナズナ#花まっ ぷ#はなまっぷ#花ふれんど＃写真好きな人と繋がりたい＃ 写真撮ってる人
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Category: Blogging
I tried to be kind to the nurse. I introduced myself. She told me we’d already met. At first, I thought she was cold, but then I realized she was actually many different nurses, each rotating through their shifts. To them, I was just another version of the same story. Another face. Another diagnosis. My troubles weren’t remarkable. I had a grief counselor, like most people there and a suicide coun... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
oh to have someone that respect other people's feelings and think first before making a decision and knowing how to act like they have someone to care about and to not hurt others feelings by making boundaries with others JUST to protect their lover's feelings god i wish i can get rid of this jealousness and i wish i dont have someone to deal with jealousy no more bcs i think it could kill me one ... » Continue Reading
Category: Friends
i met several people in my tutoring class. most of them were guys. not technically met them. we just passed each other and they left their eyes on me for a second and get back to their own. that scares me sometimes for thinking why they keep looking at me. do i look weird? is there something wrong with me? now this one was funny so i sat on the waiting bench and there were this guy talking loudly ... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
suicide is for someone who astray from the path of god or god itself forgotting them and feel like there is no chance to live for or to love for or to spend for or to feel for or to change for or to get for. they can never get anything they ever wanted because every prayers they have has been flying away like god itself blowing it up like a fucking ashes. and for now they might hate the gods and w... » Continue Reading
Category: Writing and Poetry
chase from my peaceful bed away, the witching spell, a foe to rest, the nightly goblin, wanton say, the ghost in pain, and fiend unblest let not the tempter in mine ear pou » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
i sometimes imagine a metaphysical strainer i could rinse my body through, until iam whole and clean in the sink, and all the despair is held separate and dripping above. i imagine i could toss it away. i wish i could peel all my sadness in one long strip off my skin and toss it in a bucket. no one would have to carry it. it would just sit there and be punished. it would just sit there and think... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
whenever i harbored guilt, i prayed to the angels and God to cut out my heart and wash it too. my heart sliced open, rinsed in snow. i knelt, and saw my heart phosphoresce with God s love, white at the edges. "please", i would pray, "i want to be good", though in the mornings, the yearning for God, like every true thing i had ever felt, embarrassed me, and i knew to whittle it down, until it paled... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
hand pointing to chest, fingers rubbing the top of the hand, thumb cutting the neck "i will die soon,,,," god is everything to me. sometimes im angry, sometimes im sad, sometimes i hate. only to him I give all my humanly gestures. my doctor is half of it. its as if he controls the end of my life, as if he knows everything about me down to the core, as if he is my god. instead of healing this body.... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
i always think about what i really feel. i feel like ive never felt anything that anyone else has given me. love, intercourse, gratitude, touch. this body is too alienated by such feelings to make me comfortable. i already have something to love and to feel me some love. i still feel nothing. this confusion enters the core of this foreign body until it makes me sick and longs for relief. i dont kn... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
"if you keep yourself at home, you wont do the same mistake that you made for fifteen years, you would be a new girl" » Continue Reading
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