control of feeling (equanimity)

 i sometimes imagine a metaphysical strainer i could rinse my body through, until iam whole and clean in the sink, and all the despair is held separate and dripping above. i imagine i could toss it away. i wish i could peel all my sadness in one long strip off my skin and toss it in a bucket. no one would have to carry it. it would just sit there and be punished. it would just sit there and think about everything its done