Last active:
SpaceHey Blog URL:
https://blog.spacehey.com/profile?id=1812394
Category: Blogging
dear z, i’ve been running & running since i was old enough to do my own thing & yet, i never actually run. i’ll disappear for hours & yet i’m still home when the metaphorical street lamps come on. i’d run off when i couldn’t figure out what to do after highschool & sit in those dark theatres by myself miles away from home & when i stopped talking to all my friends sophomore year i just went to a... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, the past 3 nights i've ridden this little old bicycle down to the long island sound on this island to see the horseshoe crabs when they scuttle up to the beach in the middle of the night. every time, i've been on the phone with juniper. yes, dear z, it seems that for now we've worked everything out, and we've decided to give it the ol' college try & i call her every morning to wake her up... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, it's 5:30 pm. i have family dinner in an hour. i tried calling juniper twice and she hasn't picked up, and my fear is that she is avoiding me because she is afraid that she is going to hurt me/does not want to deal with this right now. the problem is, i am now afraid that she will call me tonight, and i refuse to break up after 8 pm because is when brains go all floppy and i want to be co... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, i woke up this morning with a pit of dread in my stomach. last night juniper and i talked for hours, and, as i always kinda knew she would, she broke up with me. i think she thinks she completely fucked me up after everything because yeah, she's been kind of shitty, and yeah, her saying "i've been such a shitty girlfriend" was literally the first time i've ever heard her call herself my ... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, i am 15 feet up in a hammock as we speak. i told m. would go with her to a party at logan’s & sleep in the hammocks at the edge of the woods & i won’t lie to you, i talked (on the phone!) to juniper most of the time. good and bad. we didn’t break up, because i was drunk in a hammock, and she was in a car freezing her toes off in her landlord’s garage. we will, she says, talk tomorrow (i d... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, i work until 11 & it’s only 7 pm and i feel like i’m going to throw up & i want to go home. i might ask to be sent home early but honestly??? who knows. m invited me to logan’s house tonight for a party & she says it involves sleeping in hammocks & honestly i’m fine with that except for the fact that m doesn’t know logan buys me booze & she might get upset about the fact i haven’t shared w... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, lately i've been wondering how bad it would be if i just moved to arizona. whenever things get REAL bad i think about just buying a used car, driving to arizona, and getting a room at a super-8 or something and just sitting there with a typewriter for a while. hey, a girl can dream. i woke up today and i actually felt great, and while that mood is continuing as i write this. i walked to t... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, juniper finally texts me back. she spells my name wrong immediately. she says, how are you? (i'm terrific, juniper. i have no fucking idea where i stand with you and i haven't been sober in weeks) i say, never better. you? she doesn't respond and i go to sleep. z, i am so tired of this and i just want it to be over. whether that means she starts actually talking to me again or we break u... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, the worst thing to learn when you’re drunk at work is that your photos of the spring you spent with your estranged girlfriend have been developed. i received an email a few minutes ago telling me that the pictures i sent to be developed (the ones of when juniper and i lived in that 2nd floor apartment for 10 days) had been developed and were available for viewing. there was juniper playin... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, when i worked as a cashier, i would often get this strung-out girls late at night who seemed real dazed and out of it and glassy eyed and they'd speak so softly and they seemed so fragile. sometimes they'd also be girls i'd gone to school with. i always wondered how they became that way. i realised how last night. i was walking home from missy's house & i stopped at the gas station to bu... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, it will come as no surprise i'm sure to you when i tell you i'm writing this on the floor of the bathroom. that's right! we're once again back to the consistent and unrelenting vomiting. i can't remember what got rid of it last time (other than your little anti-nausea pills) and i am once again debating whether or not i go to the doctor about it. what does it mean when you're constantly n... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
dear z, this is, i guess, more of a post-script to the last letter than an actual new one. i have gotten no further on the afghan, but i have succeeded in wigging myself out even more. i am, in this very singular, late, and emotional moment deciding that yes, i am certain for a fact that i will be dumped on the morrow, and i am allowing for a little bit of pre-grieving before the actual thing bec... » Continue Reading
Report User
