"ruminating"
22, stupid american
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Category: Blogging
I have the feeling I'm gonna be the black sheep of my family. some of the things I say make my sisters cringe, like the fact that I've drank before. idk I just never realized that some of the things I do would be looked down upon by my sisters. they're supposed to be my number 1 supporters bc my parents are strict. but as I get older I have the feeling they'll disapprove more and more of my action... » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
aparently, I have the saddest resting bitch face when im walking around, minding my own business on campus. the amount of times people ask me if im okay is astounding. One time i had just gotten out of a super easy math exam. i finished quick and got out early. I walked out the building and this lady approached me, asking if i was okay. i was very okay, i was quite happy that i finished early. wh... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
I feel so empty when there isn't something or someone to obsess over. I was an anime fanatic in late middle school and early high school, then kpop from mid high school till maybe a couple months ago. I still love both but the sense of community I had with others in the fandom is gone. kpop is a deeper rooted love but I can't talk to ppl about it. maybe it's because I hate Twitter now, and I'm not... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
I have a purple thumb on the color wheel, purple is the opposite of green a green thumb means you are great with plants, the the lorax (idk I haven't watched the lorax in years) my mom has a garden. most people my city don't have gardens unless they're in the suburbs. we didn't grow up in the suburbs so I we never had a garden. she has a green thumb. so does my older sister. she's a plant mom. I... » Continue Reading
Category: Books and Stories
I loved reading the most disturbing shit when I was younger. not out of morbid curiosity, but more because it's something that is so different from the stuff they made us read in school that it fascinated me. I still read that stuff now but not more mainstream things like my man Stephen King and his murder plot books. some of the most disturbing stories I read include two boo » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
i asked my mom if i could go into the wedding dress shop and try on wedding dresses. she surprisingly agreed but we ended up not going. i wanted to pretend like i was in the place that i want to be in life. my mom got married at age 23. my friend from middle school will probably get married next year. i also found out recently that a girl ive known since primary school got married last year. somet... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
some old people may think that at age 20 you should learn that people dont keep their promises but idgaf my dad used to make promises all the time and he always broke them. I've just always wanted someone close who doesn't break their promises. it's literally the small promises. "I promise I'll check out that song" or " I promise I'll text you later" simple things like that people can't seem to ... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
im sitting here trying to track down the catalysts to my low self esteem. tw: ed, as always i have a not so secret drawer (almost) full of nice clothes that i dont wear. its not alot and theyre mostly hand-me-downs. they're clothes that i got and that im unable to part with. they're clothes that i cant tell people that they dont fit. its so embarrassing. when people give me clothes, they underesti... » Continue Reading
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Category: Life
I saw some tiktoks about how older kids grow up stricter than younger siblings and I thought it was a unique experience. aparently it's super common. I have 3 sisters, 1 older, 2 younger. to preface, when i say "younger sister" im referring to the 18 year old. when i say "baby sis" im referring to the youngest. my older sister and I grew up with so many rules that it caused us to be more dependen... » Continue Reading
— 2 Comments— 3 Kudos
Category: Blogging
I turn 21 in December get blackout drunk loose 50lbs hold a man's hand be romantically in love smoke weed/take thc be genuinely happy cuddle give someone a face massage be close to someone at school get a job » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I talked about my first date, now im going to talk about my date with a furry...my friends will NEVER let me live this down. This was my 3rd(?) date ever. took place last year around fall. to be clear I dont hate furries, idc what they do. I actually saw this guy's fursona on his Hinge profile and didnt care. He looked cute. he was about my height, a bit chubby, not super masculine, and he had a ... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
tw: bawdy dysmorfia thoughts I keep thinking about how I'm not satisfied with myself and I think that when I get a job then I'll save up for liposuction. it's about $3,000 for my stomach or my thighs I belive. I can't afford doing more than one body part. like if I only have 1500 they'll do one thigh. :'(. the issue is my mother will NAWT like the idea of surgery. I don't wanna make her angry but ... » Continue Reading
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