"Questioning my life choices.. "
Mentally Overwhelmed, Emotionally Fâ¨cked
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Category: Life
Me, shouting at my abdomen: JUST GET YOUR PERIOD ALREADY! This continuous "Jaws" theme music playing in the god damn background is annoying the fuck out of me. Constant mood swings, disappointment when it comes to checking pregnancy tests…it sucks. » Continue Reading
Category: Writing and Poetry
I'm just going to say it,.. You can't be a good writer if you exclude Black and other characters from your stories. Having a diverse and well rounded cast helps young people to feel seen. Imagine you're in their shoes… You've never seen yourself in anything before, but suddenly there is a friend that recommends a book that has a character that looks JUST like you. Or you see a preview of a show…or... » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
Being disabled sucks. Randomly waking several times throughout the night due to "flare-ups" and bouts of extreme pain. Cluster migraines. Chest pain due to stress. I hate it. It feels like I've lost all control of my body, and as I steadily get older this gets worse. Fibromyalgia and neuropathy have stolen my youth. It hurts to watch life rushing by me. I'm trying my best to manage my moods and tr... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Another night of absolutely fucked insomnia. Fertility meds are not a joke. I'm good. Not manic or anything, just dealing with a lot of bodily changes I wasn't prepared for, not fully. My tits feel heavy and I just want to curl up to sleep. But I feel like throwing a table. » Continue Reading
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Category: Life
Sleep obviously isn't happening tonight. I've been having weird side effects to being on hormones/fertility meds. My sleep cycle has been absolutely demolished. Which is fine, I knew some things were going to change. I'm watching Jordan Underneath videos, and gaming. I'm just trying to cope with the changes my body is going through. It's a serious adjustment, but I am trying. » Continue Reading
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Category: Life
It really sucks that I'm not close with any blood-relatives. Too many of them are either deceased due to health related issues, drug/drinking problems, or just plain being unable to maintain the relationships due to my own issues. I really wish my Dad was still alive, but he was a three pack a day smoker and whiskey played a huge part in his decline. So, there's that.. Mom? Well, she's currently d... » Continue Reading
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Category: Life
It's really eye-opening to realize that I lean more lesbian than I do bisexual, considering my past history with men and the situations I've repeatedly found myself in over the last 14 years. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a certain level of beauty from men. There are some that are absolutely lovely. However, I'm slowly sorting myself out and finding so much out about who I really am. I'm not su... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
My hair is getting longer, and it's stressing me out. I haven't had my hair this long in five years and lemme tell you, my clippers are looking pretty gorgeous right now. But I can't cut my hair, because I'm trying to grow it out. FML » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Is there no end to what my garbage body throws at me? My shoulders and lower back have been all sorts of fucked up since I was forced awake. Maybe today is just a bad day? Flare-up is kicking my ass. I dunno. Ugh. I'm currently sat at my desk, hugging my coffee mug. I just want my body to fucking not. » Continue Reading
Category: Life
The haunted look on my Fiancés face when I explain a bit of my childhood to her. ( She asked. Really shouldn't have, to be honest..) What little I can remember, due to brain damage and trauma, has upset and frustrated her. Because she helped me piece together just how messed up it all was. Mom had her faults, obviously, but raising three kids in a drug den and around unsavory people probably wasn'... » Continue Reading
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