"Questioning my life choices.. "
Mentally Overwhelmed, Emotionally Fâ¨cked
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Category: Blogging
Being unable to sleep sucks. I can't take anything for the pain or to help me rest, because I have a blood draw on Wednesday. ( My rheumatologist is testing me for everything under the sun to figure out wtf is wrong with my body ) Which means I can't use my normal means to help me sleep; i.e no wine, absolutely no thc, nothing. I'm exhausted and in pain. All I have is Dual Action Advil for the pai... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
Just realised that the anniversary for my Dad's…death is coming up. I don't know how to feel about it. My Aunt told me that his friends are going to do a motorcycle run, to give my Dad one last ride. They have some of his ashes and I wish I could go.. Since he passed, I've come to terms with a lot about my life. The mistakes that I made along the way. The people I hurt and everything is sitting in... » Continue Reading
— 2 Kudos
Category: Life
No one is giving trans kids hormones! How many times do I have to scream this?! Does anyone understand the hoops one of us has to go through just to get approved for a gender appointment, let alone hormones? We have to actively prove that we are trans and have been enduring dysphoria. Even then, » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Desperately need to get more than a few hours of uninterrupted rest, because I'm being slowly driven insane by being constantly woken up due to the severe pain in my legs, hips, and lower back. It's even begun to crop up in my ribs and shoulders. I don't know what's going on, but I'm trying to wait until my rheumatologist appointment because maybe I'll get the answers I need. If not, it's another ... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
All the bills being passed to fuck up Translives are really overwhelming me, and I really just want to fold in on myself like a collapsing star. » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I'm having a hard day today. My sleep cycle is absolutely fucked. I've been sleeping all day ( restless though it is ) and awake all night, struggling with chronic pain and depression/mood swings. Everything is loud and I'm just overwhelmed - but trying to manage things. Keeping up with the news is not helping at all. I'm tire » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Does it ever really hit you, that life is so fleeting? We are all comprised of moments. Precious though they are to us, they could be gone in the blink of an eye. Everything that we are whispered away. Odd questions like this have gone through my mind for as long as I can remember. I don't know why death has plagued my mind, but it's always there. Whenever I'm having a warm moment between friends,... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I'm so tired of having to do research when it should be a doctor doing this, and not the patient. Scouring journals and information, message boards to find what works and what doesn't. What could possibly be causing me all this fucking pain all the time.. There may be a possibility of things working in my favour, but I'm so tired of the late nights of no sleep and being overwhelmed by pain. It's f... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
Wishing my Dad was here. ( He died from Cancer a few months back, and I'm still not handling it well. I'm autistic, and never really learned how to process my emotions or someone not being here anymore. ) Checking the news has made me feel overwhelmed and frustrated. I don't like how I feel right now. I know it's not wise to stay so informed all the time, but considering I'm autistic, trans, bipoc... » Continue Reading
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