I’ve been thinking about thinking about thinking lately. Recursive thought like a hall of mirrors, except all the mirrors are cracked, and instead of reflecting me, they reflect me-ISH. A me-ISH-mosh-posh mishmash mash-up me! Versions of me, me-ifs, maybes, might-bes and never-weres, misbegottens and might-have-beens! As if I was built by a god with a head cold. You sneeze and the universe wo... » Continue Reading
I keep hearing it all day, ever day, every second in any online art community. "Remember Cristali? Remember that drama ? That was crazy!" WHAT IS THERE FOR YOU TO REMEMBER? The stupid rant videos Nawnii milked out of the situation? The cringe compilations of his horribly traced animations? The MOCKERY of anyone who supported him? Never the harm, though. No one cares a... » Continue Reading
SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX! Sex this, sex that! “Have you ever had sex?” “You’re a freak, but we can still have sex!” “Please have sex with me.” “Do you have a partner? No? Let’s have sex!” “Please, please, please !” SHUT. UP. SHUT YOUR SICKENINGLY BRUSHED MOUTHS AND DIE . Do you people ever think about any » Continue Reading
Warning: Sexually explicit content It was still warm when I picked it up. I liked that part most. There's a difference between something that's cold and something that's cooling . Cold is final. Cold means you're too late. But when it's still warm, there's a narrow little stretch of time where it almost feels like it's still alive. Like maybe it could start moving again if you just held... » Continue Reading
Your Honor, my brain has entered a guilty plea! Let me be very clear: this is a strict legal matter. I didn’t decide to think the things I think. My brain acted independently, without my consent , and now it’s facing trial. I’m just the lawyer. Thoughts are crimes. Not all of them, obviously! Thinking about, let's say, food isn’t illegal. Neither is thinking about a c » Continue Reading
What even counts as trauma? It feels like many people think of it as some big boom moment. The switch that flipped and made everything go wrong. But if that's the case, I don't think I'm traumatized. I've had all my issues as long as I can remember. All those moments in my life that could've been "the cause", I feel nothing for. But that word gets thrown around by every shrink I've... » Continue Reading
I almost got kidnapped when I was thirteen. It wasn’t dramatic like the stories. There was no white van, no chloroform rag. Just some man who grabbed my wrist outside a Walmart and started walking fast, like we were late for something only he knew about. I think I was in shock. It took me a moment to scream or struggle. I'm sure everyone around us thought I was just a petulant brat throw... » Continue Reading
At eight years old, I met God. Filling my senses, filling my body. Against the empty pews, I cried, This is good, God is good. God burrowed himself into me, Splitting my body in halves. Panting, sticky and wet, » Continue Reading
My own needs sicken me. Often, I'll run my fingers through my own hair. It doesn't help, but I pretend it does. Like I'm trying to create some sort of placebo. I trace my own lip with my thumb, then laugh at how stupid I must look. They're dry and chapped, as always. Probably carrying a lingering tabacco flavor. Not very kissable. I lay in bed and close my eyes, trying to pretend th... » Continue Reading
Warnings: NSFW, possibly disordered eating(?) The air is hot and sour, rank enough to sting my throat, and it makes me dizzy. Plastic-wrapped meat bulging with gas like blistered skin. Berries melting into a single sticky mass, their seeds rising to the surface like freckles on fevered flesh. Cheese furred over with mold so soft it looks like hair. I press my face into the smell and brea... » Continue Reading
Self-proclaimed "intellectuals" While I do my best to not judge others, there's one genre of person I cannot stand. People who claim they're some sort of supergenius after googling synonyms and spouting base-level "deep thoughts". There's nothing that irritates me more than inauthenticity. Unfortunately, I tend to attract these individuals. I assume it's because I type formally, but the... » Continue Reading
Report User
