went to a house show on saturday to the benefit of a local being fucked by I.C.E. originally i was going to go with my friend, but she got a job recently so she had work. i ended up just going myself. i wasn't expecting it to be such a small turn out. i think it's a new venue, so they don't have the same pull as the more established ones. but honestly, i love small intimate shows like this one. th... » Continue Reading
this could be a controversial opinion to many different sides of this argument, but the "umbrellification" of subcultures has done a net negative to the space. like, ive noticed this trend of people who would've once called themselves punk/scene/emo/goth now self-labeling as "alternative." but "alternative" is not a scene, its a blanket statement. it doesn't have its own history, only the history ... » Continue Reading
i haven't done taekwondo in two months. with my dad (/ instructor) dying, and no longer having a place to work out in with all the bags and targets and bo staffs and everything has made everything so much more difficult. but i never wanted to quit, so i decided that today was the end of my break. i've tried looking for gyms with open floors and kicking bags i could go to, but there's essentially n... » Continue Reading
i went to my childhood home on sunday; partly for the superbowl, and partly because my dads funeral service was on the following monday and i was riding with my family there instead of bussing. when i got to the house, i was surprised to see my cousin there. i knew my aunts and uncle and brothers were gonna be there, but he lives an entire timezone away. the last time i'd seen him was when i still... » Continue Reading
my number one New Years resolution for this year is to have a more healthy, and less addictive, relationship with the internet and technology. this guide is less of a general guide for the entire world, and more so my own personal guide for 2026 i will be trying to follow that you could find help in. but anyways, here is Caesthoffe's 2026 Guide to Have a Healthy Relationship with Technology and th... » Continue Reading
i told my boss the night i found out about my dads death. i originally was just going to take the day off, but my brothers were still in-state so i wanted to spend as much time as possible with them. i took my fri/sat shift off which means i have to go back to work tomorrow. luckily my boss was chill about me no being there, so hopefully none of my coworkers are mad at me for ditching. although in... » Continue Reading
i hadn't realized that my last blog post about christmas would unknowingly be a description of the last time i'd see my dad alive. the first day i found out, monday after work, i was still in shock. it didn't really hit me until yesterday. i cried the entire bus ride to my dads house. today has been a lot better, but all that makes me feel is guilt. every time i distract myself with a YouTube vide... » Continue Reading
a couple days before christmas me and my friends did the yearly white elephant gift exchange. i brought a bee-themed sanrio gacha box (which ended up being pompompurin) and i ended up getting some cute stationery supplies. we played a couple drinking games. one of them we went around the group and poured water into a glass and whoever overfills it gets to drink (i lost twice- ended up chugging a M... » Continue Reading
my state's been under heavy flooding for about a week now. there was evacuation notices for multiple cities, including my hometown. luckily it wasn't the whole city, and the warnings are no longer in effect. one of the levees (which is an artificial wall built to protect flooding) at a major river broke. the damage to the cities that had it worst is so sad. houses are destroyed, airpor » Continue Reading
me and my friend Em went to the flea market again !!! this time i wasn't as strapped for cash, so i ended up spending more than i thought i would. the good news is that i got most of my christmas shopping done, which is what i was saving most of my money for anyways. me at a coffee » Continue Reading
there is this genre of media called “Suspended animation,” in which a character is stuck in a stasis— whether cryogenically frozen or stuck in time —for an extended period of time, and then emerges into a world they no longer recognize (a la Demolition Man). and that is exactly what living in the age of the AI bubble feels like. no longer understanding the technology you grew up with or the social... » Continue Reading
i just got back from one of my favorite local bands ever, Sunbather Die, who just had a show at a bar. im still a little tipsy as i write this, which is kinda funny considering i only had a single-shot whisky coke in a tall glass. the bartender was pretty cool tho, i wonder if he gave me a bit extra. but anyways, the show. i got there at 8:20-ish so they'd already been playing for a minute. i was ... » Continue Reading