"becoming a proxy"
19, US, INFP, goth (silly)
Last active:
SpaceHey Blog URL:
https://blog.spacehey.com/sheep__apnea
Category: School, College, University
I thought I was doing better, I don't understand what the fuck is happening. I've come to realize that everything in my life can't be soft, it has to be rough. rigid. hard. painful. I noticed a long time ago actually, but I figured things can get better in due time. Good things come to those who wait after all. Well im waiting, im trying so hard to be patient. If its not an issue with my school, i... » Continue Reading
— 2 Comments— 6 Kudos
Category: Life
what's the problem with being happy? what's the issue with finding something you care about? if you thought, "well nothing, why is that a problem?" then Id tell you that I agree, because I do. But I can't seem to understand why other people don't. I found somebody, I found this girl, actually I befriended her about three years ago after a horrible situation in my life, she helped me pick myself ba... » Continue Reading
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Category: School, College, University
well, good news I suppose. Im not on academic probation, I'm just on a warning...which means my grades need to be perfect this semester or else, literally. So I'll make sure to do amazing, one I don't have a choice, and two, I'm so scared of failure, I need to succeed. Being a mortician would mean everything to me and this I how I get there, so I gotta do what I gotta do. I switched my major into ... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I am legit so scared for the new semester already. I can't fail again, I'll get kicked out of school and lose everything, I can't let that happen. I can't be a failure, not already. I try my ass off and yet I still don't succeed so I'm beginning to believe I'm just destined to suck at everything I do... but fuck I'll try, I'll try to do good. no fuck that, I know I'll do good, I have to, I don't h... » Continue Reading
Category: School, College, University
I absolutely hate school, so so so much. I was never excited for college cause I knew id feel this way, and here we are, this feeling is now here and it's lingering into my Christmas break. I just want to graduate already, but I have so long until I can, I at least want to get to my actual major that I care about instead of the classes I take now that mean nothing to me. I feel like a waste of a ... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Well, just to say, Im very grateful for where my life is at and very appreciative for my financial aid...yet i just need to get this off my chest, so far, college has been nothing more than miserable. Im so tired already, im failing at classes, and im lacking so much confidence...I feel like giving up, i feel like a failure, and worst of all i still can't drive. I am a horrible adult. I miss highs... » Continue Reading
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Category: Writing and Poetry
I have yet to realize the potential of my own hands, calling upon them to do mundane tasks like eating or writing school papers instead of putting them to the use they were intended to have. To create and indulge, not break, not consume, I wish to utilize this method of creativity, giving myself the strength to hold my pencil stiffly, balancing the lead, its tip, upon the leathery white paper, dra... » Continue Reading
— 1 Comment— 7 Kudos
Category: Games
Personally, through my years of very extensive sims playing, the sims 4 has a lack of charisma to it that makes t » Continue Reading
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