clandestine, he/him
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— 4 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
i’m always toeing the line between gentle and biting when it comes to you and i can’t bring myself to cross it. in hums of silence i wish you’d run your fingers through the hair at the base of my neck and tug, and wonder what you’d say if i asked. i guess it’s the way you don’t know what to do with your hands and whisper sweet nothings about how you hate me, can’t stand me, wish i was dead. i neve... » Continue Reading
— 2 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
books are better than movies but movies are better than real life, because at least then i can imagine a timeline where you and i have fairytale love. you keep me so weightless i hardly feel the tug of reality til it comes crashing down on me; i’ll always trip gracelessly into like with you, into ugly laughs and the smell of grass and mosquito bites and bedroom floors and teenage dreams in the bac... » Continue Reading
— 2 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
i have this dream where you sleep next to me. your nose whistles when you breathe, and it’s the most precious sound in the world. the skin on your back, which i have only felt through thin t-shirts, is warm; like your hands, like your honey brown eyes, like that smile that makes my mind go fuzzy. i reconstruct this fantasy in my mind time and time again until i’m brought back to reality. i miss yo... » Continue Reading
Category: Writing and Poetry
i am over soft lips and dark eyes and holding onto nothings that carry the weight of the world. i fall asleep to the sound of your voice in my head telling me pretty lies like you do and press down on bruises where i wish you’d hurt me. i’ve never felt you and i still feel colder where your hands should be, where they’ll never be, where i bite when you get too close. i want your everything. i’d ra... » Continue Reading
Category: Writing and Poetry
wish on a number, pretend im bulletproof. get spam calls from your state and hope its you. i cant ever pick up the phone. webweave your words when youre not around and wonder if you meant any of it. wait for another number. another shot at life. breathe in his cologne and suffocate, punch my teeth out and see how the blood tastes. wont see you in june. xo, halloween. (an older piece i never posted... » Continue Reading
Category: Writing and Poetry
in my head exist scenarios in which it’s alright to want you this much. i card my fingers through your hair and nothing ever came between us—not him, not her, not that way you get when nothing feels quite right—and my imagination falls apart because it’s always felt better to hear “i hate you” from perfect strawberry lips than the saccharine everythings you’d feed me. i picture you in every wrong ... » Continue Reading
— 1 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
ive only been the best at being bitter. im not angry, golden boy, not anymore, but i find ways to hate you anyway, like its the only way i can hold onto you. there is nobody so disarming, and i hate that the most. youre soft all over and even your edges smooth out when the sun filters through the blinds just right and i understand what angels are like when i catch you with your eyes closed. youre ... » Continue Reading
— 2 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
i want to be loved softly and not at all. your care should be infinite and i will never touch it; you will give it to me like putting out a cigarette on my neck and it will burn and i will beg for it all the same, on my knees with a little too much written all over me and you will look away. you will look away because i ask, because i swallow the words and chase them with your spit before i speak ... » Continue Reading
— 6 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
i pick up the phone just to breathe on the other end of the » Continue Reading
— 6 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
sometimes, i feel like a kid again. running cold, cold, cold, from heart to blood to fingers to the look in his eye. i don’t love right. i am push and pull. i am the bite and the tongue smoothing it over. i am the siren and the sailor. i don’t understand why. he does not hold it against me, i hold it against myself. i am grounded by my past as much as i am haunted by it. you can wash away blood wi... » Continue Reading
— 4 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
fuck your friends. i say it but i dont mean it, but maybe i do, because he tells you he wants to hold you and i fantasize about killing him. see reference: im bitter cocoa and sugar sweet. i take on a voice thats not mine so i can misplace the hurt and hope it doesnt rub back off on me. it never works but persistence sticks. it cant get worse (so she says) but theres a long way to go before it get... » Continue Reading
— 3 Kudos
Category: Writing and Poetry
i do not have a name but you call me what you like and anything you call me by sounds like heaven falling from your lips and you speak sharp, cutting, and the sight of blood was never so sweet before i met you. youre the reason they say books are better than movies, because you are all words and poems and undeniably real and still youre enchanting like nothing else, not like hollywood but somethin... » Continue Reading
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