i always try to be transparent with people about how im feeling. i thought that if i made sure he knew i liked him, it would turn out okay, considering he was the one to initiate a lot of things thus far. i had never felt so loved as i did with him. in his simple gestures or the way that he would look at me. why did it change so quickly? did i say something wrong? i wish that he would just talk t... » Continue Reading
its a weird thing to say because my entire life ive lived to love other people. i always strive to see the good in others despite their actions, whether its good for me or not. maybe its a weird defense mechanism id picked up sometime in my childhood but its something thats stuck with me for a long time maybe i was determined to be a better person than i was told id be. but the truth is that im ju... » Continue Reading
i like to imagine someone who would hold me like music has. someone who would listen to the songs i used to sing and hear the same beauty in the overlapping harmonies and accidentals. someone i could look at and the stars would sing the same songs. 2/8/24 » Continue Reading
i think of odd things to help me fall asleep sometimes i dream that i have a tiny little apartment out in rural japan. not much around except my neighbors and maybe the local school. a shop or two. i dream that i have big shelf full of old ceramics. all of the ones that no one wants anymore. chipped crystal wine glasses and bowls with the wrong glazes and trinkets that ive pieced back together ove... » Continue Reading