"L I V I N"
In the process of discovery
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Category: Life
Had to delete Twitter for a bit again. I'm just struggling with this neurotypical world. I don't want to play games. Just be straight with me. I'm not saying that I'm being played with, I'm just fucking overwhelmed. I'm low on cannabis so I'm not even thinking 100 percent clearly. Society, in general, has so many issues. I'm just trying to survive. It doesn't seem as very many people actually car... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Landsberg has mentioned the BJT the basic joy test. A test to gauge your day, his is the first sip of coffee. I've tried this, but everything I just lose interest in. Today I had that feeling that I should just stay in bed. This will be my test, dies the simple act of waking up fill me with content? If so, good day ahead. If not, medicate immediately and intensely. Rest, body, and brain. Stay in t... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
Some days my brain is my worst enemy. Let's be honest, it usually is the culprit of my complete lack of being able to do anything. It lies. It deceives. It does anything and everything it can to destroy me. It hasn't won yet. I was successful today. Got shit done, got set up for success tomorrow. Yet this fucking brain telling me that I'm no good and won't ever be any good. The ups and downs are d... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I need to constantly monitor my energy levels. Sometimes I get too zoned in on one thing. When this happens my energy drains without my realization. When I'm feeling really good the energy drain can happen at a much quicker rate. I must embrace the spoonie concept. I must focus on how many spoons I have, how much each spoon is worth. This will be a process, it may take a very long time. Being abl... » Continue Reading
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes
What do I need? For one to keep my mind occupied. If I'm awake that mutherfucker is working full steam ahead. I need to learn to control and focus that energy on positive and constructive outcomes. My mind will keep going even if my body won't. Cannabis is good at helping these issues. I have literally killed myself working for others before. I felt like there was no way I can work a regular job a... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
I am in the process of discovery. Being at the bottom has given me plenty of time to look around. I've discovered more about myself than anyone could imagine. 40 plus years of being lied to, gaslit, and completely being misunderstood. All of this has proven to me that I am not meant for this world. However, while I am here I want to enjoy it to the utmost. I want to experience the life that I was... » Continue Reading
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