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xM@TTx
"writing poetry"
lvl 19 (he/him) IRE
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xM@TTx's Blog Entries
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Tap Tap
Category: Writing and Poetry
01/07/2022 I want to write like you. To say gut wrenching things that make people questions their own sanity and mine. Words that make people guilty and in love. Lines that mean nothing to anyone but me. Details that will be lost in the keys. I want to feel like i've made a difference but i know i never will. Me and mother earth are running out of time and everyone seems too famous these days. » Continue Reading
Questions
Category: Writing and Poetry
06/21 The ground is wet, the mud acts like quicksand. I can feel my body sinking further by the second. I can't hear anyone above, no one has any tears to shed. You're not there. Why would you be? I've done nothing for you. I only dragged you quicker than the mud. Unlovable. I'm 7 feet under now, 1 extra for luck. If you want me now I'm gone, write me a note. It doesn't m » Continue Reading
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Violent City
Category: Writing and Poetry
06/21 I don't like living through the pain, just like living with it. Reasons to not get better scrawled across my brain like a to-do list. Proud of walking to and from recovery. Sense of self warped, mind has changed. The monster has stopped rattling the cage. There's a town in my head, an evolving city. The occupants vary as time goes on. Some are kind to me and some are not. As a landlord, I » Continue Reading
Therapy
Category: Writing and Poetry
2021 The clocks are not in sync, they're counting double minutes. It's getting hard to think, she looks on with a grimace. The clocks are out of time, each tick rings out across the room. She is not sublime, and this chair feels like a tomb. The clocks are off-beat, at least they break the silence. The ticks are like a fleet, an attack of pure violence. The hearts beat off time, the clocks don't r... » Continue Reading
Turn Me Off
Category: Writing and Poetry
2019 First hit, first kiss, first miss. We were meant to mean everything but now we're just nothing. And there's no way to stop my spiral, but to turn off your vinyl. And let me breathe before I go again. We're a story that never ends in my head. Because you know I can't breathe without you. I know that I deserve better. I've heard it enough to stop believing and without you I stop breathing. » Continue Reading
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Tell the Congregation I Don't
Category: Writing and Poetry
17/06/21 It's hard to say I do when I don't, It's hard to say I will when I won't. It's hard to be how you want me to be, It's easier to be a cold dead shell than me. It's simple to break but not to put back together, It's difficult to believe that we both belong here. But I'll keep saying I do when I don't, I'll keep saying I will when I won't. Because I'm not » Continue Reading
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Secondhand Sadness
Category: Writing and Poetry
14/06/21 I saw you walking down the street yesterday. You look the same. I never saw your face but I knew it was you by the way you walked and changed the song you were listening to because it didn’t fit the mood. You were gone when I drove by again. I forgot you lived so close. I almost forgot about you completely. I don’t miss you but I miss those times. Before I had to wear a mask. (Two reaso... » Continue Reading