Rae H

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"contemplating the future "

Leap Year baby and excited for my birthday

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Rae H's Blog Entries

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Proud of my kid

Category: Life

My daughter (12 and so smart) has made the decision to stop seeing her father. She wrote out a letter to tell him why she doesn’t want to go to his house for the weekend. She tried to text him multiple times stating that she doesn’t want to see him but that if he wanted to talk to her, he can text her. My daughter’s father hasn’t responded to a single text from her or myself. He’s not asked what h... » Continue Reading

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Adulting

Category: Life

In the last two weeks, I’ve gone from my back being out of place and my neck hurting, to having a kidney stone, to being diagnosed with double ear infections and a sinus infection. All the while, I’ve been going to work, taking care of my man because he just got a new job, caring for my dogs, cooking and cleaning. I’ve not been able to take any time off to be sick. Needless to say, I’ve been exhau... » Continue Reading

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Five years

Category: Life

Today marks five years since my son passed away. Two and a half years wasn’t nearly enough time to have with my Tavian Xavier. His absence in my life is reflected as this gnawing black hole in my chest. Tonight, all of my alter candles are lit. The warmth and light coming from them is bringing some life to the part of my heart that grieves for my beautiful boy.  » Continue Reading

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This song has been keeping me going

Category: Music

Imagine Dragons- Whatever it takes  Falling too fast to prepare for this Tripping in the world could be dangerous Everybody circling, it's vulturous Negative, nepotist Everybody waiting for the fall of man Everybody praying for the end of times Everybody hoping they could be the one I was born to run, I was born for this Whip, whip Run me like a racehorse Pull me like a ripcord Break me down and b... » Continue Reading

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Boston lyrics… because it hits different when you want to run away

Category: Music

"Boston" In the light of the sun, is there anyone? Oh, it has begun... Oh dear, you look so lost, your eyes are red and tears are shed, This world you must've crossed... You said... You don't know me, and you don't even care, oh yeah, And you said You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah, Essential yet appealed, you carry all your thoughts across an open field, When flowers gaze ... » Continue Reading

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My weekend

Category: Blogging

I needed my weekend so much. I get to rest and clean my house…. And smoke, and clean some more, then rest some more 😂😘😘. While I’m resting I found a new show to watch. I hope I like it  » Continue Reading

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‘Tis the season

Category: Life

Halloween decor is coming out which means that it’s home decor season and I can’t buy anything right now 🤬 Next year is another opp » Continue Reading

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Grateful for my healthy relationship

Category: Life

I’ve gone through so much in my life. So much damage, abuse, gaslighting, lies, death, etc… After being rescued by the man that I never would have thought would turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to me, I am beyond grateful for how much he’s helped me heal, stood by me, stuck up for me, and loved me. I love our relationship. It’s the healthiest relationship I’ve ever had with anyone.... » Continue Reading

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Migraine

Category: Life

I woke up today with a nasty migraine. Light, sounds, and temperature sensitive today. I’d really love to remove my head and put it in the closet until it feels better.  » Continue Reading

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Responsibility

Category: Blogging

Starting Wednesday, I’ll be running the store I work at for nine days. My boss will be gone on vacation. I’ll be mostly in control because the other managers won’t do their jobs the way they are supposed to be done. It’s exhausting and stressful and I have my own doubts about my abilities but I am actively trying to tell myself that I can do this and it’s all going to be ok.  I hope everyone has a... » Continue Reading

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Worst camping trip ever

Category: Life

Our four day camping trip ended on day two and quite abruptly. One thing after another went wrong from the moment we got there. The last straw was my daughter not tethering my dog after walking him and he got away us and attacked another dog. We got it broke up fast but not fast enough and the other dog needed stitches according to the owner of the other dog. We of course gave all of our contact i... » Continue Reading

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Camping trip count down

Category: Blogging

Work sure has been kicking my ass. I’m proud to say that it’s been helping me to lose weight and I’m down a pants size for the first time since my son died. It’s been a long time since I felt this good about what I’m doing. To top it off, our camping trip starts on Thursday. Four whole days in the mountains, next to the river, being in the trees, enjoying the sun… I can go on but I won’t, lol. We ... » Continue Reading

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