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— 3 Comments— 11 KudosPinned
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes
This list will be updated weekly/monthly because I am still coming up with new ideas. Not all is written, I want to improve my reasoning and maybe apply some images as references? Anyway - enjoy my little, treasured and crazy wishlist. » Continue Reading
— 6 Comments— 47 Kudos
Category: Blogging
I once believed I had experienced an ego death, but I couldn't have been more mistaken. What I took for an ending was merely a rehearsal. This feels different. This feels irreversible. I do not mean death in the physical sense. I mean that my life, as I ha » Continue Reading
— 8 Comments— 44 Kudos
Category: Blogging
I was supposed to be on a little writing hiatus due to my exam session, yet the life itself is giving me clear reasons to write and contemplate on specific topics. First of all - hi, I am Altair, and my blog posts usually » Continue Reading
— 18 Comments— 131 Kudos
Category: Blogging
Change has always been spoken of as though it were a verdict. You've changed - a phrase I have heard so many times that I stopped counting, yet never fully understood why it is so often spoken with accusation, or, at best, cautious approval. As if becoming someone new must mean betraying who you once » Continue Reading
— 24 Comments— 206 Kudos
Category: Life
Getting better has its eerie side. At its core is a quiet, unsettling fear: the fear of losing your spark. To some, it might sound strange - almost like a longing for misery, a senseless wish to invite chaos back into your life. But the truth is more complicated than that. When you grow up in depression, its gloom can settle into the foundation of who you are. It becomes familiar, almost intimate.... » Continue Reading
— 6 Comments— 60 Kudos
Category: Life
I woke up one day with a strangely sweet aftertaste resting on my palate. It wasn't pleasant in any simple way - it was ashy, intricate, almost haunting, brushing against my taste buds with something that felt like quiet anxiety. It lingered, refusing to dissolve, as if it carried meaning I hadn't yet learned how to translate. Nothing else about the day seemed unusual. The air was warm despite the... » Continue Reading
— 5 Comments— 34 Kudos
Category: Life
I lied when I said I could live without you. The truth is, I can't. Not at all. You're fading from me in the cruelest way. Not all at once, but slowly, like something slipping through my fingers. I could never remember your face, and your voice is becoming distant, blurred, like an echo I can almost grasp but never quite reach. And what hurts the most is not knowing. Not knowing if you're still ou... » Continue Reading
— 1 Comment— 10 Kudos
Category: Life
Night has always been a peculiar companion of mine. It arrives quietly, almost respectfully, laying its dark cloak across the world as if inviting the restless to finally become still. For as long as I can remember I have welcomed it like an old friend. In the silence of night there is a certain kindness I rarely find during the day, a soft distance from noise, expectations, and the constant movem... » Continue Reading
— 3 Comments— 10 Kudos
Category: Life
I found myself wondering today what I would say if I ever stood face to face with the people who hurt me the most. The version of me that existed once - the quieter, more fragile one - would probably cry. Not loudly, nor dramatically, but in that quiet way where tears arrive before words do. She would search their faces, almost desperately, hoping to see even the faintest shadow of regret reflecte... » Continue Reading
— 2 Comments— 30 Kudos
Category: Life
I allow this post to be my one, single moment of weakness. For a while now, my life felt deeply disrupted again. I knew the reason in the quietest chamber of my being, and I also knew why I chose to ignore it. It's going to be a messy entry - so forgive me for that. Nothing in my life changed because of other people. I would lift my head from the depths of my room to seem okay. Yet internally, mon... » Continue Reading
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