grocery shopped today with patrick, bought foods that'll last a bit maybe..? i mean i hope it stretches, lol. i made us some hamburger helper, and I actually properly measured stuff this time, lol. it makes me happy to do little things like this for him. it came out really well too. tomorrow we're gonna try to make some pasta dish i found on reels.. im excited. and we'll have the house to ourselv... » Continue Reading
uhh drug mention..? yesterday's blog got a bit too heavy for me unintentionally so ill keep my thoughts in check this time. today i watched a lot of family feud and baking shows. drew a few pictures i like. didnt really talk too much to friends it feels like, but I could be misremembering. dunno what im doing tomorrow besides grocery shopping. mm. i want spaghetti soon. unrelated to that, but ... » Continue Reading
today i actually ate a dish with tofu in it. the texture is really weird but the 'taste' (or lack thereof) is fine. id eat it again. maybe a different 'flavor' for it. we had Thai chili and white rice with it. i didnt go to that store i wanted, which isnt surprising since i mentioned something like that would happen, but its ok. eventually. emotionally im exhausted. my sister got upset today and ... » Continue Reading
a bit sad tonight. i feel weird am i thought about as much as i want to be i hope so. this isnt much of a diary entry. sorry. today i drew, and i had toast and rice. im incompetent so i had to have my toast buttered for me ;; tomorrow i might be going out but i wont get my hopes up. the weather is bad and everytime i get excited for anything it kind of gets delayed or canceled somehow. we'll see.... » Continue Reading
i missed two blogs in a row i think. the first was intentional, but yesterday wasnt. i had actually managed to fall asleep at a good time, yay. nothing too crazy happened... oh, actually- my dad sent me a package of... tangerines? in the mail. patrick saw a box in the fridge and asked me what it was, and i had no clue because i didnt put it there (grandma did). so i opened it up and lo and behold,... » Continue Reading
im thankful for music and love. Thanksgiving went Ok. now that ive gotten that out, i can do my daily scheduled vent. feeling extremely nostalgic for the 2000s/2010s. i know its stupid but i genuinely cant help but get a pit in my stomach from the thought of how much i missed out on from middle school to now. no parties, no outings, I barely got to hang out with people at all. but my sister sure w... » Continue Reading
my day went really well, actually. i mentioned it in my bulletin but, i did things i meant to do, my hair was done, and i got the christmas chococat plush. we also made cornbread and i fixed up my profile a little...? layout is the same but with added blinkies and some text..ish. different song. its overwhelming on mobile somewhat (to me, at least), but it looks just fine on the computer. i really... » Continue Reading
think i'll stop saying 'im gonna do (x), (y), (z)' because I never do. all i managed to do was something i needed to sign for. giving myself mini goals and not accomplishing them really makes me feel super useful, lol woke up lateee today. 3pm. i have to stop doing that. i wont though. sigh. minor headache in my eyebrow. i dont have much to say that matters, the usual. Boring. i talk about my bad ... » Continue Reading
today was weird. it's 2:54am. i slept for way longer than i meant to. i woke up, my throat was still itchy, my mood was sour, and my eyes burned, so i slept again. i woke up around.. uh.. 3 technically? that could be why im not as tired right now. but i also have been sleeping bad. my throat is still itchy and ive been sneezing a little;; stop getting worse! i think i really needed to rant that lo... » Continue Reading
todays blog post. im listening to so much (for) stardust. this album is genuinely so beautiful and means so much to me. how on earth was this made with so much emotion. it nearly brings me to tears and ive listened to it at least 100 times all the way through now. a no-skip album for me. "i used to be a real go-getter, i used to think it'd all get better" i didnt do much today but i was still sort... » Continue Reading
today was weird it wasnt necessarily bad but i didnt feel like i was here for most of it. there were things i wanted to do that i didn't ;; did today even happen???? all i kinda remember was my dad text me and then i got violently sick. oh. and someone was blaring love sosa outside while i was puking. was kind of funny. i think im going to the store for a few hours tomorrow. maybe. if i feel well/... » Continue Reading
caught up in my thoughts again. i want to change. but the first step is always the scariest and i cant take that leap by myself. i want my whole personality to be different. i want to seem approachable or cool. i want to dress different. i want to have my own voice and opinions. i want to be comfortable. idk. dunno if that's the effects of growing up with a simultaneously neglectful / smothering ... » Continue Reading