100 as i write monday spoiler warning for the whole saga of the poppy war i decided to write some more, to finally put into thoughts what this book—this saga—put me through. and what is it that some words on paper put me through? utter, complete, suffering. the poppy war is a fantasy retelling of the second sino-japanese war, as far as i am aware, and it is dementedly gutting. it follows fang runi... » Continue Reading
1246 while i begin to write this monday i only achieved one good thing today and that was fasting for twenty hours and some some minutes. i wanted to break my fast by eating a 70 calories biscuit but my mom had made breakfast so 250 calories it is. horrendous, in some words, tragic in others. i spent the night doing jackshit and trying to sleep while on an empty stomach, which tired me out and is... » Continue Reading
1104 nice hour still sunday the heat is unbearable. i tried taking a nap, almost a ritual to say goodbye to my mattress, and i woke up an hour later sweating and hungry. i only did one thing to resolve those two problems and it was to turn on the ac, i’m trying to fast until tomorrow at, like, 1 pm. besides that, i didn’t finish beau is afraid because i felt like it was going to give me a panic a... » Continue Reading
526 as i write this i think its a sunday i actually had somewhat of a good day? went out with my parents and i ended up getting a book (and heatstroke) i had been looking for for months (in the first circle by s olzhenitsyn). it was super cheap and turns out it’s a first edition from 1971, kind of bums me out becau » Continue Reading
1002 pm as i write this i don’t know what day it is today was… stressful. my scale broke, and i am pretty sure my best friend found my weird ao3 account (where i’ve wrote some fairly questionable things), which led me to orphan all of my works in a panic. too sad. i was able to move the conversation into something else but i’ve been stressed about it all day, and i can’t bring it up again, i can’... » Continue Reading