"at work"
25 and chronically bored (unless hanging out w my gf:))
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Category: Blogging
i just sometimes feel like i will never be satisfied, or happy with my life at all. like i will always miss something, i will always be chasing an impossible manufactured existence. it just isn't happening, and i know this. i will never reconnect with old friends. i will always be too un-passioned, laisse-faire, to connect to any other people closely really. and those who are unfortunate to fall ... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
"i have nothing to be proud of" is a thought i had, while semi-mindlessly putting an order away at work this thought has been sticking with me all day, and i think it has produced some sort of fruit, of clarity maybe, that i think makes me feel slightly optimistic for the potential of slow, incremental, agonizing change instead of something that is a set personality trait. i actually was go » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
according to a youtube video i was watching while work was slow, intellectual bypassing is a form of "trauma response", (i wouldn't consider myself traumatized, per say. as a child i thought i had a pretty good deal.) that involves you rationalizing the pain others cause you, and becoming superficially "aware of" your emotional states in order to bypass the actual feeling parts of your feelings, a... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
haha i think it’ll be funny if i start blogging today i started finally cleaning my room after i got off of work. it’s rly nice. instead of finishing it though, i cleaned the kitchen and laid down. my laptop is broken so i don’t have anything to distract myself with. i’m bored and i’m also out of weed :( there’s nothing to do. maybe i should just finish cleaning my room and my laundry 😳 » Continue Reading
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