"I am my obsessions."
and I'm trying.
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Category: Blogging
i found a tarot based journal prompt for thirty days on tumblr so i think i'll try to do it on here. i'm usually not very consistent with planned journaling like this, but i'll try. Day 1. The Fool. What is new or just beginning for you? everything. my future. i have ap testing the first week of may, so i'm going to start studying tomorrow. same for the sat on may 7th, i don't know if i want » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
i guess i'm scared of forgetting. for the record, i haven't forgotten anything. i have pictures, spotify wrapped playlists, archived emails, school assignments, diary entries from seventh grade, old texts, just in case. i remember everything. sometimes even down to the day of the week. somedays i want to forget it all. but i don't regret anything, and i know if given the chance to redo it all, i... » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
i don't feel my age. i know so many people experienced such extreme lows during the initial lockdown in march of 2020, but i like to think covid didn't affect me. it was my freshman year of high school, i was fifteen, we had our january midterms and the cheer season came to a natural end in february. i knew the national quarantine was coming since the end of december, no one believed me back the... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
i did my nails just to shove them down my throat again. what a waste. » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
after blog entry 3 you think i'd be proud of myself. i feel so deeply unsatisfied with myself. i hate feeling like this but it never stops. i mean, that's a lie. when i did play, the applause on opening night made me love acting. for maybe an hour or two, i felt so proud. i felt this rush of success after dying in front of the audience. i felt the death of my dissatisfaction too. what grandiose ... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
on sunday, at the summit event, there was this station for coloring. i didn't finish, but when i got home, i sat down for twenty minutes until i finished the page. i don't know what this says about me in regards to blog entry 1, but it was a very cathartic experience. » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
today was good but i'm crashing and it's only 630. my uncle won't stop sending keto muffin recipes to the family groupchat. no one ever texts there. subtle brag that you're "healthy" even though you can't get any bitches. i ended up doing well on a physics test i thought would tank my grade. very grateful to the universe for that. science club is hopefully done for the year. i’m a mess and i did... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
i'm so tired. i had a freak out early. it might've been an anxiety attack i don't know. i tried to take a quick nap because i couldn't stay awake and i was so scared when i woke up. i take my driving test tomorrow and i have a math test. i didn't get to read any more of my book or do any more ap gov work. i have a headache and i feel so sick. » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
i’m so stressed oh my god so tomorrow i need to: - finish dorothy day research for an essay - catch up on ap gov/watch videos on unit 3/try to memorize case rulings for frq monday - do my math homework - practice my flute because i'm playing for the school on april 7th - my wiz quizzes so i can get a membership after my ap exams - make a quizlet for the french vocab test monday but i’m going t... » Continue Reading
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