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Category: Life
i hate april. all the worst thing have always been happening to me in april. i also love april. all the worst things always made me feel comfort. the twisted feeling of safety and familiarity. i was made to feel this way. that is what i deserve. i wish it always was april. i wish april never happened. ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
after constant begging of my partner, i am yet again on the same meds. for now it is stable, i feel okay. i am saving for another psychiatrist appointment. i'll keep you updated about everything ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
after constant begging of my partner, i am yet again on the same meds. for now it is stable, i feel okay. i am saving for another psychiatrist appointment. i'll keep you updated about everything ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
i have been sick for the last week. so sick so i got sent to a hostipal. they did n't let me to take my laptop, so i was inactive. i may need my meds changed some time soon. i wonder if he thinks of me ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
these meds took the best of me. i feel horrible every day, i hurt my closes ones as well. i officially stop taking escitalopram. i'm not taking it for 4 days already, there is not much difference yet, but i'm hoping for the best i'm looking for a new psychiatrist as well ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
i feel myself becoming more and more agressive and delusional. the breakdowns are frequent. i am not sure if it 's how the meds are supposed to work. they defeneatly should not. i have grown completely obsessed with him, i think about him 24/7 i need to be put down or i will go insane ~ s » Continue Reading
— 1 Kudos
Category: Life
i met up with him yesterday. we talked, i told him everything. how i feel. i kissed him and he cried. was i dreaming? then i stole his razor. and when i came home i used it and cried. it felt different. i can't stop thinking about him i'm lucky ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
last night i was drinking on a discord video chat with my friends. we were sitting and talking and some of us drank. i drank a lot, the most of everyone else. i know i shouldn 't but it was one of our friend's birthday. there was also him, my crush. he was not drinking though. i don't remember too much, all i have are a few od screen shots taken by my friends. they told me i was doing weird things... » Continue Reading
— 1 Kudos
Category: Life
MY BEST INTERNET FRIEND WHOM I HAVE GOT A CRUSH ON JUST ADMITTED THAT HE IS JEALOUS OF MY OTHER INTERNET FRIEND, IT' S THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!,! i am gonna mess with him a bit more, see how far can he fo with his jealoussness ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
people only seem to want to talk with me when i'm drunk or sexualize myself. only then i seem appealing to them. it is okay though, i don't mind. everything for a little bit of attention. i know i shouldn 't drink on my meds, but how can i get attention otherwise? ~ s » Continue Reading
Category: Life
i am doubling my meds dose todaay as my psychiatrist told me. for the last few days i have been nothing but sleepy and tired. only energy drinks kept me alive. intrusive thoughts started getting more intense, but besides that it 's okay also i am very excited, because one of my best internet friends moved closer to me recently and we will be ablr to meet more often!!! we might even meet this week,... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
always alone in class, nobody to sit with, friends are only on discord servers. chronically online on twitter, lurking on 4chan, sometimes even deeper out of morbid curiousity. the headphones are always on, playing headache inducing music, covered with cheap stickers. everything is covered with cheap stickers. a bunch of colorful kandi bracelets wrapping around freshly cut arms. always new cuts. s... » Continue Reading
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