Day 56 of improving myself until we reach the 20th Century (Boys!)

Listen, I know the 20th century is long gone but 20th Century Boys has just been on my mind all day. I might actually have to read it but more on that later! For now...

Exercise - I didn't Exercise today and I haven't been eating healthy either, it's showing too. I don't gain weight easily, so it doesn't show on my body, I'm lucky like that but I do get these intense stomach aches and pains whenever I neglect healthy eating. Whenever that happens, I just go on a health kick for a month or so. The typical Travis Bickle "no more bad food" type deal. I just feel like garbage, I look 'healthy' according to what society deems as a fit looking individual but there are definitely fat people or bigger people than me who are definitely healthier than me. If I was healthy, I wouldn't be having these stomach cramps. I feel like trash, not in the millennial "oh I'm so trash" way but in the you just ate junk food and now all you want is a salad way. I had some healthy food today, chicken with pasta and bell peppers and carrots. I love that meal. I think it's a traditional meal from my country, I'll look into that. Bell peppers are just the best vegetable, I'm sorry but they just are. So, I feel a bit better after eating that but I gotta go on a serious health kick, no snacks, no soda, no junk food but seriously no soda! Nothing makes me feel worse than a glass of soda when I feel like this. We start tomorrow! 

Reading - I read a chapter of Catch 22, I haven't started some of the other books I downloaded yet. Yes, I read digitally to save money. I prefer reading physical copies believe me but money, capitalism, you know how it is. So, I read digital copies instead and if I like a book, I buy a physical copy. I'm looking for a physical copy of Crime and Punishment and I have my eye on a few other books, Kafka's two big novels and White Nights by Dostoyevsky. Anyway, I wasn't feeling it today. I couldn't focus on my book for some reason. I've read like 30 pages of that in one sitting which is no big feat but it's weird that I could read a whole 30 page stretch with full concentration and then struggle to read a 10 page chapter. Maybe it was a weak chapter, I don't know. 

Writing - guess what? I wrote. I wrote something, it was very good. I wrote an opening monologue for a comic I'm working on, it's probably never gonna be out because I never get around to actually drawing it but it was so good. The words fell from my fingers. I've had this idea in my head for a while so maybe it's a matter of just sitting down and writing it out. I want to tell a high school drama type where the characters take their situation wayyyy too seriously. So, there's like wars between different after school clubs and all that dumb shit, the type of dumb shit that I've actually seen for my own eyes. Anyway, I wanted something based off of Apocalypse Now because two books that are in this comic's DNA are Heart of Darkness and Paradise Lost. There's the idea of isolation and being ostracized. That makes it sound more serious than it is (which is the point), I want to say what it's about but it's just so embarrassing, it's the type of premise where you'd read it and roll your eyes, thinking "ugh, of course Slip_moth wrote this" maybe at another stage. I'm just really happy with how the opening lines turned out, since Im so bad at dialog. 

Learn Something - my friend invited me to do something this week and I think I know what he's planning. He wants to do a speedrun of Pizza Tower and Im down but I'm so rusty so this is so cringe, I can't believe I'm saying this but today, I brushed up on some Pizza Tower speedrunning techniques and I used to be pretty good at the game. I knew the technique and I could easily read the patterns of the bosses. I stopped playing though. I haven't played games in so long, I love gaming but it's just not the hobby for me. I do love Pizza Tower though, by the way, it's the Mario Kart friend, he was so generous to buy me the game! What a Saint. Anyway, I feel the need to clarify, I don't have many close friends, I've met some new friends from debate club but I don't have a lot of friends that I'd take a bullet for, there's like 5 of them. I'd take a bullet for all 5 of them in a row. Anyway, speedrunning, then I just kinda watched speedrunning videos of other games, I also know quite a few earthbound speedrun techniques, that's where my username on most other websites comes from its usually [adjective]EvilShroom, the worst enemy in the game because I'm that annoying. Damn, I wanna play more video games. tomorrow...we game! I know that Conure also has a new video on speedrunning out and that was also really interesting. Out of all the videos on speedrunning that I watched today, I recommend Conure's new video. They give me such gender envy which isn't something I feel often. The weird thing is the last time i got gender envy was from Yuuko from Nichijou. Enough about that! Let's not talk about Nichijou or gender, each of those conversations will go on forever. Speedrunning! 

Drawing - I didn't draw today. I got busy (lazy)

Guitar - I didn't do it. I get embarrassed so I try to play when Im home alone because I've always been told that you need to play loud when you play guitar and I don't wanna disturb anyone (and I'm embarrassed of course). I will recommend a song though, I think everytime I forget to play guitar, I'll drop a song rec, I'll put you on! Ok, so I haven't even read 20th Century Boys yet but now I wanna for some reason, I don't know why this happens. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself, Spacehey as a whole has great taste in music and I try to be all secretive with my music for some stupid reason and I need to give back to the community sometimes yk? I wanna recommend 20th Century Boy by T-Rex. That song is great, it's like a real dad-rock classic. I love it, I've been listening to it all day, that riff is stuck in my head and I wanna listen to it right now actually. It just feels like a song of a bygone time and it is but yk what I mean right? I wanna learn it on guitar actually. There's also this whole playlist dedicated to 20th Century Boys and it's beautiful. Listen to that on YouTube, I'll link it if I remember to (I probably won't). Anyway, yeah, I didn't play guitar today sorry. 

Do something - I did do something, I went to the Mall! It was the first time I went out shopping in a while and then I went out again. I went to the mall to buy plastic wrap for my textbook because apparently, I'm out. So I did but we needed groceries too so while my family bought groceries, I took my sister to the book store and we looked at all the overpriced books, I'm kidding a lot of these books are well worth the price for their covers alone. I saw White Nights and Kafka's big two (the Trial and The Metamorphosis). I was actually looking for Fire Punch, I read manga digitally too but usually, I like to buy my favorite volumes and that specific book store always had Fire Punch in stock until I actually started getting invested in it, now it's gone. Ah well, I already read it, I'll pick up my favorites some other time, I do also want to buy some of my favorite books for annotations and rereading. I saw many great classics and it was time well spent. I went to the store again in the evening but that wasn't really noteworthy. 

Relaxation - I watched a terrible movie with my mom and my sister last night. It's a family Christmas movie where the mom and dad swap bodies with their children and isn't that weird, doesn't anyone find that inherently wrong. There was also really weird incest jokes and it was such an uncomfortable watch, I know it's a family movie but it is the worst movie to watch with the family, I'd rather watch Boogie Nights or Wolf of Wall Street with my family than watch that with them again. Too much incest and that's coming from an Arrested Development fan! I did like the cast though, one of them starred in Oppenheimer and its like what are you doing and the one girl who played Enid in Wednesday was in it too and I actually think she's a great actress but everyone I've spoken to thinks she's cringe but I don't know, I love her, she's cool, I like how she presents herself and her fashion and aesthetic, it's cool! 

Thank you for reading this entry! I'm sorry for being so annoying about 20th Century Boys, I just have this itch to read it! Do you ever feel excitement for something before getting involved in the Fandom. I don't know if that's a normal feeling or anything but I've been getting that with 20th Century Boys which isn't exactly helped by my dad, he has never read it but when he talks about his childhood, I get the same Vibes. Me and my sister were doing the dishes and my dad came in and told us about how he took a walk with out dog today. He mentioned that he went through a cemetery and came across his friend's grave. It's a strange story, I don't feel like getting into it but eventually, he started talking about his childhood. He was describing a whole other world almost. He was laughing and smiling the whole time. That's rare from him, we're kind of similar in that way, I can come off as intimidating (how you get intimidated by a twink? I don't know but people do) but when you get me talking, the smile does not vanish from my face. He was so happy but he grew up in such hard times. Like, we disagree about most things politically, he's a homophobe, a transphobe, a capitalist, just think Tony Soprano's political ideology but even so, he's my dad and in some ways I look up to him, not politically but like I get it, it's the way he grew up. He was forced into a certain line of thinking by his circumstances and it's really messed up. I don't wanna get into topics of racism or police brutality but I will say that he was kid of no younger than 10 years old dealing with that and still he looks back on those times with such happiness. I look up to that sort of attitude. He had such an eventful childhood, like besides all the awful stuff that happened to him, it was eventful because he always wanted to be doing something, even today he's really curious about everything and he wants to explore everything. We used to go on hikes at like 6am or 7am, me, him and my sister. We still do sometimes but not as often and I miss that attitude of wanting to do everything and anything, I've kind of grown comfortable of a life of mundanity and I want to explore more and do more which is probably my goal for this holiday. I'm gonna do as much as I can and one day, if I have children of my own, I'd like to share stories of my youth with them, I want to avoid his bigoted shortcomings but also replicate his strengths if that makes sense. Honestly, I think he'd make a great stand up comedian, he's a great story teller, he finds humor in terrible situations, he's a transphobe. Netflix would love him! Anyway, it's getting late, I'm writing my final exam tomorrow, too do loo! 

Addendum : 

T-Rex - 20th Century Boy 

https://youtu.be/atmNLbycafM?si=YvrQ1Pqer1CF8B1-

20th Century boys Playlist 

https://youtu.be/oW1qu6tPkOE?si=vgw_BqRcXfpGLBxR

Conure Speedrunning video 

https://youtu.be/EqXXMNMGfq8?si=m9fwFAjo2jcb0qpQ