11/17/23: didnt get into the musical ;(

maaaaaan i didnt get in the musical!!!

i cant say i wasnt expecting this but im still really dissapointed. 

i thought my singing audition went pretty well but theres a lot of people i think are MORE talented than me even if i am still talented

theres this girl louisa and shes one of the greatest singers ive seen before and i just KNOW shes gonna be on broadway like she sounds like a developed broadway singer whos been doing it for years shes just got that voice yknow? shes on stuco too and shes really polite but im just insanely jealous of her. like she gets all the choir solos and she gets whatever she wants in theater in choir which she deserves because shes extremley talented and shes been doing this for years and shes even been in large scale local theater productions too like she knows her stuff AND SHE IS GOING TO BROADWAY i just know it

i just wanna be her man shes so talented like hearing her sing is an out of body experince she sounds so good shes one of the best singers i know

AND I WANT TO BE TALENTED LIKE HER AND GET ALL THE MUSIC STUFF

i wish i could hate her too but shes just so nice to everybody even people who arent her friends like AHHHHHHH

and i mean there are people who did way worse than me at auditions like this one girl sang a panic at the disco song that was completley out of her range it was kinda funny tbh like youre supposed to audition with something from a musical....and also something you can physically sing and you wont scoop to hit notes that are WAY TOO DEEP for your range....like guys thats step one is to sing a song FROM A MUSICAL not a "band" thats been just one guy for YEARS and who featured on taylor swifts worst song 

sorry i just have a vendetta against panic at the disco/brendon urie BECAUSE ITS NOT A BAND ITS JUST ONE GUY AND ONE PERSON IS NOT A BAND AND HE DOSENT EVEN MAKE GOOD MUSIC AND HE RUINED A TAYLOR SWIFT SONG

anyway

i just really wanted to be in the musical but ill feel better eventually, and theres always next year!

plus ill get to watch it and i know its going to be a great production, theres so many talented people in my schools theater program

im having a sleepover with some friends tonight which im excited for and my stepmom is gonna make her super super good mac and cheese for us! lemme tell you this is the greatest mac and cheese ever like i could eat a whole pan

and im gonna have my switch so im gonna get to play mario party with them! its so much fun i get really competitive with mario party

i got starbucks this morning which was a bad idea to get a venti....its too much coffee and now my heart hurts and its beating all fast. i shouldve gotten a pink drink and not a coffee because i always end up drinking too much and my heart beats super fast, and now i cant sleep in the classes im bored in to pass the time!!!!!

today is the last day before thanksgiving break and i cant wait to do nothing and sleep in, the worst thing in the entire world is waking up early i hate hate hate it so much. and im super excited for thanksgiving this year bc im gonna be with my dad and my stepmom is gonna make stuffed mushrooms which are so so good im hungry just thinking about them theyre one of my favorite foods and i dont get to have them very often

im probably not to blog much or at all during thanksgiving break since i normally blog when im at school not that anybody cares lmao, nobody reads these and i just do this for myself mostly

sometimes i wonder if i get rich and famous if anybody will ever read these, i know i want to read these when im older to reminise and see everything i was thinking. i blog like a diary really and ive always liked the idea od a diary but id always lose them or just stop writing and not do it for months, but this is great because its like a digital diary!!

alright bye happy thanksgiving!