i heart

i guess i hate how long it takes me to get home. i guess i hate how nobody is there to pick me up. i guess i hate how cold it is. i guess i hate never being alone. i guess i hate the loneliness, despite it all. i guess i hate having to survive, not just live. i guess i hate how blurry everything is. every passing moment merges with the next. until nothing is concrete. like an elongated dream i can’t wake up from. i just lose myself in it the longer i sleep.