childhood friends

Right so I have 5 minutes to type this before I go to sleep. Lovely.

My childhood friend, I used to call her my younger sister, is being bullied, severely. This is the girl i spent hours with every day, ate her mom's kebabs, had pizza parties with, pretended to be mermaids with. She's my everything, she made me who I am, she taught me how to swim despite her being like, 4 at the time. 

Since I moved to Hoenn from Johto, we haven't really talked. And it hurts so much. I love her, i love this past image of who she was, they're the same thing, kind of sort of. It's been three years, and yet I still would tear down the sky for her. I don't know who she is anymore, and yet I would do anything for her. I learned she's good at makeup now, that's new, learned she switched high schools. Should've known this. Did not know this. 

Her mother called me today. Her mother calls me her son, we plan online sleepovers and movies to watch and things to buy when we meet up, although we're oceans away. And I've never really heard her sounding so hopeless before, as she talked about losing touch with her own daughter. She was like a second mother to me. Now I'm her second confidant. 

Who would've thought so much would change in three years? We've both lost all our friends. She's getting bullied in a new school, I developed an eating disorder. The movies we watched did not prepare us for this, they talked about how cute the clothes we'd wear would be, how to be cool in your own way. 

Perhaps this is growing up. In which case: god, it hurts like no other. 

In another life, we're still gasping for air and grinning at each other after holding our breath in the deep end.