november 3. 2023

hiiii

first blog post of november!!!! woooooo

i cut my hair again even tho i said i was growing it out hehe

i was supposed to go to a party tn but i decided not to go. i have had a really stressful week n i was so so tired and only know 6 ppl at this party. 2 of them barely know me, 1 doesnt like me and i prob shouldnt rly talk to 1 bc of the former.

its stressful and i wanna complain but at the same time i feel like it inherently makes me look bad to be in that position. like if its always me and im always the one dealing w this. on the other hand i know it isnt just me and if there was someone else, just like me, doing all the same things. i think they would get the same response.

sry for being vague i just dont wanna get anyones feelings or whatever

i submitted an application today for an apartment!! i am really hoping that it goes well and i get it. i know im not the perfect candidate which is stressful but ive been thru so much finding a place i just want this one. its a really good unit that i can afford and even tho its not cheap its still good when u look at prices around here

im literally thinking abt it all the time. i really need more space (my room is the same size as the dining room there). i would like my room if this wasnt it. if i had my own bathroom and kitchen it would be seriously liveable. but its just this tiny closet of a room with me and all my stuff and my cat, who i cant let out of the room bc my roommates arent keeping the house cat safe n cant even shut the door. 

anyways guys i am just gonna end it by saying im super stressed and drained but hopefully not for long. i cant rly afford anything to treat myself so im mostly trying to stay distracted!! gn