Hiiiii :3

Been gone 4eva. SOrry about that.\

I have changed genders, states, and other things probably since I last posted on here. Not sure why I started or ended these entries. It's just the way it is.

Right now, I am about to be homeless... I am so poor and so unmotivated. Whatever. I have made friends for the first real time since highschool! I actually have a GROUP? fucked up if you ask me.

Said "group" mainly consists of my sibling (<3<3), my nerd friend (<3<3), and my coworker friend (<3<3). I have a lot of love for them. I'm still trying to figure out how to function in this social environment due to my lack of experience, but they are forgiving.

I have been making music more. In the past, guitar was an occasional hobby, less of a passion. Now, I have access to all sorts of instruments, and I've been playing all of them whenever I feel like it. I've been playing bass the most. 

My sibling's friends are all musicians, they're in a band together. I'm practically part of the music scene in this town. Crazy! I'm still shy enough that people don't necessarily know my name, fortunately. At most, I'm probably loosely associated with their band since I only really go to their shows.

Been on testosterone for around a year now. I can't tell if I pass as cis or not, but people do use he/him upon meeting me. nice. 

I am now going to do a sily litle thing FOR FUN, bear with me. nobody will see this shit anyways so it don't matter B)

name:   Corduroy

nickname:       ROy

how old are you: 19

zodiac sign:       whatever...

current location: Oregon!

eye color:     Blue/green? somethinf like that. I also have brown dots I just discovered

hair color:  Natural blonde, black dyed.

hair type:   Straight, layered, few inches past my shoulders in the back and to my jaw in the front

hieght:     5'4

your heritage:     north europe

what's your middle name: Jack

shoe's you wore today: beat up converse, like BEAT. can barely put them on. toes can go through in multiple spots

your weakness: I am shy and insecure and introverted, sometimes in selfish and self-centered ways.

your fear: dismemberment and loss of senses. I don't want to go blind. body horror and gore get me sometimes.

have you ever ridden a mechanical bull:    long time ago

do you want to: I'd for sure do it again

goal you would like to achieve this year: kill self

first thought when you wake up: not even kidding i thought about suicide

best physical feature: all BAD

who is your bestest freind: sibling! we hang out often

when is your bedtime: I am nocturnal, 4-9 am

your most cherished memory: beloved childhood dog. 

pepsi or coke:                 both bad

mc dondalds or burgerking: both bad

singel or group dates: I never go on dates.

what is the last song you sang:     Double Dare by Bauhaus

does playing the guitar make a girl/guy more attractive: Blushing... ;)

what is your biggest pet peeve: hard to open jars, especially if sticky

do you drink: Nah

ever been drunk: Ja

do you smoke: nope!

do you "SMOKE": YEP. especially lately. high right now, even

do you sing: Yes, often.

what color underwear do you have on:  Nvy blue

do you want to go to college: I did, but deadlines make me think of ending things

have you ever been in love: Kinda? Never worked out though. Oh well, ok

do you wnat to get married: No, unless there was a legal/financial reason to.

do you believe in yourself: Vague question. I maintain a healthy level of doubt.

do you believe inothers:    Some days more than others.

do you like thunderstorms: Yes! Yesyes

do you play an instrument: Yes x9

what do you want to be when you grow up: dead, really.

what country would you like to visit: All of them! Right now, Egypt. I lived there as a baby but don't remember much. And Bulgaria, since my parents live there. 

how many CD's do you own: Countless

how many DVD's do you own: like one somewhere probably. maybe not. no tv.

how many tattoo's do you have: one, for now

how many piercings do yo have: 2 right now, 3 more that have closed up, 5 total

how many things in the past do you regeret: all of the above, being born

FAVORITES

shoes: converse, my brown boots (steel toe :0)

radio station: never llisten to radio

drink: water. lemonade, on occasion.

car:  my 2009 kia optima. we're friends, in my heart

place: The Woods

song: Angeles, Dagger, or Hunter.

movie: Nostalghia.

moment: stage 1 sleep where your thoughts get weird. 

color: Dislike orange, like red and blue and brown and grey and black and green and

meal: I love ayam peniki and a good savory crepe. Sweet crepes too.

IN A GUY/GIRL

favorite eye color: don't care

favorite hair color: don't care

short or long hair: don't care

height: don't care

body type: don't care

does ethnicity matter: don't care

piercings: could be fun, not necessary

tattoos: could be fun, not necessary

BED SIDE MANOR

do you think you are attractive: No. Average at best, but MAN it;s hard to look In the mirror

are you attracted to someone who does not know it: no.

would you like to be someones fantasy: Secretly I REALLY want someone to want me

hunter or hunted: hunted. 100%

do you kiss with your eyes closed or open: closed?? people do it open???

a little or a lot of tongue: Little. been a while since I kissed anyone and these answers are based on my admittedly flimsy memory.

older or younger: Never met someone younger than me that's mature enough to date. Not like people older than me are all that mature, either. My oldest friend right now is the also the most immature one.

lights on/lights off or candle light: SEX IS SCARY. off. candles are fun, though.

do you like to cuddle after: Never done that. Not sure.

do you like to cuddle in general: Maybe, it's been a lot of years and I don't remember what it;s like

RIGHT NOW

what is todays date: 2 Nov 2023

what time is it: 6:34 pm

who are you thinking of: Suicide..............

what are you listening to: Dead Cowboy by Lightning Bolt

do you love someone: I love everyone. Not in love with anyone.

do you know where your mechanical bull is: in my heart,,,

does someone love you: My friends and family love me. Nobody is in love with me.

is it raining: Cloudy.

how many myspace friends do you have: like 20 something

are you happy:   don't care

This survey is uhhhhh https://www.pimp-my-profile.com/surveys/view.php?id=34598 got it from another spacehey friend