4am monday

I feel miserable, I feel hopeless

yet everyone fails to see that, why can’t I just ask for help? 

why can’t I take help when im offered it?

what do I want? am I stuck in a loop?

am I just another project the universe created?

why can’t I be normal, why can’t I fit in with the others?

am I really that unwanted, was I really that big of a failure?

please for once. make me feel like I belong here. 

my life right now is on a deadline, the deadline is the day of the concert.

without a reason to stay, why bother to deal with the world anymore? 

after that concert, my life will come to a close. the thing I was living for had then ended, then what?

deal with myself? hold on another May? hold on till I die?

I can’t. please. I just want someone to truly love me. 

please. that’s all I want. 

it’s not that much to ask for.

get rid of me already.

- james.