Sometimes I Don't See The Fucking Point

Life has felt so incredibly boring lately. I know I am in a rut because I am not where I want to be. I want my actions to mean something, not just be another thing I do. I want to put my music out there and be myself, unapologetically. I want to grow more confident in myself. I don't want to work this lousy job anymore and I don't want to go to this lousy school, but I do it anyway! Because I think I have to. I want to meet people and connect with them through art. That is what I want. Life feels so fucking boring and depressing. My feelings do not match my surroundings. I am in college, with a job, with a place to sleep at night, and some social interaction. Though, I am lonely and depressed. Interesting isn't it that you can be in "the best place possible" and feel like shit. It doesn't matter what you have or do if it isn't fulfilling or meaningful to you. I hope that in a couple of years I won't feel this way and will be much closer to a happier life. Though, I don't know how I'll get there.