Captain's Log

This weekend has been okay so far. I have been working on my studies. It is hard it wouldn't feel like you're never going to be able to work full time ever again. I've been working part-time and doing good work for about six or seven years having to quit jobs or cutting down my clientele is really hard on my finances because I have a goal of financial freedom. Currently in college I'm three semesters away from completion and sometimes it feels like even working at my own business I won't be working full-time. I know for some Seasons I'm going to have to hire other people to just do the work that's available to my company sometimes my spouse go into my job and do some of the work for me when I'm having stays because of my CPTSD. 

Some days I wonder am I just going to be working on the farm as my only source of work and some days I wonder maybe I could just work one or two days with my degree and then maybe just work one or two days at my business. Sometimes I wonder what is be enough for me to get financial freedom. Because I'm not one of those persons who flips houses or a stock trader or you know somebody who works those High volatile markets. I just do roadside assistance probably going to give me a tow truck, I want to grow some stuff on my Farm and just hit up the farmers markets to be put some of my produce and stock to restaurant refrigerators and probably work two days a week for an HVAC company college for HVAC.

It's scary to think about how hard it is to not be able work full time I would like to have game full-time positions at my old jobs possibly managing the dollar tree or being the full-time maintenance technician at the aquarium maintenance company but have CPTSD.  I have bipolar disorder and sometimes I think my bipolar disorder is holding me back but that's the thing about bipolar disorder you think you're fine and you're not fine.

But I'm not going to let these diagnoses stop me from achieving my goals. If I have to hire somebody to drive my tow truck once I get my tow truck, then I'm going to pay them to drive my tow truck. If I got to hire Somebody to be a farm hand, then I'm going to hire somebody to be a farm hand. And if I can only work One or two days then I'm going to work one or two days at someone's HVAC company.

I am an American that means I can do whatever I want to do in reason with my morality to accomplish my goals. So if I have to take frequent breaks from my jobs and only work one or two days for each job and hiring people to do my job on my farm and driving my truck then that's what it is but I'm going to reach financial freedom. I grew up in poverty and I'm not going to be an impoverished adult.