AHH I ASKED HIM,..

Y AM I SO ANNOYING!!!!!

i asked him again if he thought abt what he wants to do going forward.... now that he knows the reason we broke up was a lie... . i feel like i'm pressuring him to get back together n i rly dont wanna do that my heart just hurts i want us to be on the same page- i can't move on if i don't even know if he wants to talk this whole thing thru or not. waiting on a response rn... god my heart HURTS SO BAD! i wanna puke! im terrified of what he's gonna say!

..........

okay a few mins later. he said he really hasn't thought about it.

why don't you love me as much as i love you? i'm thinking about u all the time, about what's going to happen between us. why doesn't anyone want to fight for me as much as i fight for them?  

i only said "oh, okay"

he only responded "sorry"

:(

i wanna die. i said "no worries, do u wanna talk abt it though? its fine if not"

he said "not at the moment no"

why am i even doing this to myself. just why??