The past few days have been a bit of a blur, I am not logging my activities as I usually would and I feel more lost than usual. I dislike that my memory fails me so often, and often I have doubt if I am fully acting upon my own will let alone something alternative- bringing into question the genuineness of my connections and actions. Would I have done the things I have if I was more present? Would I be friends with the people I am now if I was present? Can I truly say that I am trustworthy if I myself deceive my own trust? Am I living or am I perceiving? The lines no longer blur, I see the disconnect as wide as a ravine, and as the day comes to an end, I wonder to myself if I am leading a life through the desires and wants of others, with nothing to truly have ownership to myself. It is the bankruptcy of the metaphysical.
-Sentient
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