About friends and people wearing off

Idk if I mentioned this before but getting to know new people, "becoming friends" always brings me this insane amount of excitement. I get extremely fascinated by that person of group of. I think about them, think about things I could say, think about when can we see each other next time, just the most excited need to be more in their company 

But then it's like I get used to them. And it's not exciting anymore. Before this situation, I met a guys two year ago at a pride event and even in that case as time passed even answering his messages became just routine, almost something I didn't always enjoy a lot. Granted, he wasn't the best fit, we were just two pieces of a puzzle but not adjacent

And yk my depression sometimes gives me apathy and carelessness.

And before things went bad with my classmates I had day were I would shut off cus they'd be just too much and overstimulating. And in a way, a part of the first excitement I had with them wore off too. Then when I isolated for good I noticed that ya I missed them but mostly just cus it meant having no one, NOT not having THEM in particular yk what I mean? 

And idk why it happens. Again, my human connections skills just. Never developed and now I'm unable to work in any social environment that goes deeper than small talk and I mostly suck at that too.

But idk it's something I never got. Like the same thing happens with videogames for me. Do I just see others as tools? As toys? Idk. I don't know nothing, especially not myself.