DIARY 2

alright so. this diary isn't really 'dated' (it's been written between 14.05.2023 and 16.05.2023). That night I felt so odd. I wanted to write about this immediately but I felt so, so very tired. I felt like I was dying, physicially. I couldn't stop falling asleep. My energy levels have been very, very low. As I went out, I couldn't help but notice that familiar smell. It may be true that she and I may not have been so close, but I always appreciated her insight. I'm sure she was visiting me that day. What does she want to tell me? What is it that my ancestors want me to know so desperately? I told her to visit me in my dreams, but my dreams were very weird that day. I'll write about it later. 

The next day wasn't a bad day at first. It was fun, after all. I slept more than I should've had. I was tired. exhausted. I just chilled in class. But I had to go and fuck up again and crash the car again against a pillar. This time the trunk won't properly close and i don't know what to do. I wish i wasn't so awfully bad at driving. The day itself wasn't bad, but it turned bitter when i got home. I ended up fighting with my parents? They're bitter themselves rightnow, and I am perfectly in the middle. I don't care for picking a side. They should fix their problems themselves. They make me very tired sometimes. 

I wanted to see if I would dream anything today that could tell me anything, but I didn't. I feel like shit. I don't know what to do. Once again, I want to die. I just want to rest. I hope the messages will be clear later. I need to know what I should do. Today I have yet to do much. I am writing this from university because I'm very bored and sleepy. Very, very sleepy.