And life is worse again

I don't know if I've ever said it here or not, but I have an undiagnosed disassociative disorder. 

Whenever I'm agitated, I start to hallucinate; they get fed by the emotion that agitated me.

So if I'm happy or excited, it's usually something I'm excited about or something I'd be happy about if it happened.

If I'm scared, angry, or stressed, it feels like I'm in a nightmare; I see demonic creatures or figures where there aren't any.

The latter is starting to happen more than the former, making life hell.

And the hallucinations only feed into themselves more.

So I'm currently spiraling downwards.

Right now, though, I have no way of stopping it.

So I guess I'll see y'all at the bottom.