Uncensored

I'm at a loss. I have a big heart and I love way to hard. These last 20 years have put my already fragile heart and damaged mind in to a free fall. I can't tell those close to me. They already pity me. Half the time I want to give up on love and just have hook ups but my heart hurts with each encounter. I'm confused as to what I should do. So I'm here just venting.