Blog #8

The past few days that have gone by with us together have been nothing short of ecstasy. I love him, and I love hearing him admit to loving me. 

He is more comfortable sending me photos now, and I love saving them. All of this has been amazing, but I hate the discomfort of missing him. I hate the loneliness. Although his voice helps, there still is such a sense of rue that I have when I am not with him. I despise these feelings, and despise not being able to reach out and feel that he is there.  

I wish I could truly lay alongside him. I would want to be as close as possible. Whether it be waking up in the mornings together or it be the result of falling asleep in his arms on the couch of some place at some time, I want to be with him. If he was asleep, I'd reach out my arm around his neck, with my hand placed holding his head just lightly enough to not wake him. I'd nestle my fingers in his hair, and place my other hand on his cheek as he slept. I would love to feel his soft, beautiful face. I'd touch just under his eyes and lips, soft enough to keep him asleep but still let him know I am there. And I'd kiss his forehead, thousands of times over. I'd be unable to keep his face away from his. Not in an aggressive way, but rather just enough to build an atmosphere of safety and fascination. I would pull myself more into his grasp, and lean into the comfort of his arms more than I can explain. 

And these things shall be done. I will find myself alongside him someday. I will be able to hold him with all of my trust and love. I let you all know that I miss him, and to my darling, I miss you.