my last direct letter.

starting out, reminders were so nice. i would always remind you to eat. sleep. drink water. to stay sober. talk to someone if you need help. regulate your emotions. wake up at this time. get ready for school. we have to go. if you are sick stay home. i know everything even if you dont tell me exactly. reminders turned into tasks. ill go to school if you do. ill drink water if you do. ill eat if you do. ill sleep when you do. i will stop listening to things that i find out about, but only if you tell me first. when your schedule started draining me, reminders turned into weapons. you told me to remind you to eat and now you are upset that i reminded you. you asked me to remind you about drinking water but now you are upset that im controlling what you do. i reminded you about my boundaries and you didnt listen, so you cried to me about how you felt bad. i had to tell you that my boundaries were unclear even though they were in thick sharpie written on my body for you to see. i reminded you that when im with people, i dont want to be touched and you got mad at me because i didnt respond well to your public advances. i stopped believing in reminders. why give you the respect if i get hurt? to me reminders are simple. i remind you of your task, your job, your wants and you do, or you dont. here is a new reminder for you; rumors are only believed if it's the first time you have told the story. im here to remind you that lights dont easily flicker, but rumors easily spread. im here to remind you for the last time that this is my life, not yours. let me remind you to keep me blocked. no one wants to see your face because its cut up from the weapons you drew in a one way battle. this is my final reminder that obsession shows connection. keep my name in your mouth and i will be stuck in your head forever.