Okay maybe I was wrong yesterday.. 4/8/23

I was going a little manic yesterday, I mean I know he was talking to another girl but I don't know what about. We were talking last night, I was sitting in my chair with my hair down and makeup done. I had the pink and white pajamas that he had me call him names in on, and I just sat there holding my stuffed animal. It was late, I was tired; normally I'd be in bed around that time. I think it was like 1 AM. We listened to music, (for once I had control over the music), he just let me play whatever I wanted. It was nice; but soon we got bored. I just sat there looking around, it was very late so we were on call. I was sleepy, so I asked him a few questions that normally I wouldn't ask and I kept asking him if he was talking to other girls. He said I was too much to handle, so why would he talk to other girls. 

Kind of rude, but whatever. He was loving me and making me feel happy. He kept calling me nice names, I felt happy. He's been super loving lately.. he's been giving me gifts and such, it's nice. I like this part of him. It went away for a long time. I'm glad it's back.

I just wish I was older- so I could drive, we could do things together, I can be in college.. then we could actually have sex or something like he wants to; though sex is really scary. I'm still a virgin. I just wanna be older now, but at the same time I'm terrified he'll leave me once I get older.